Page 35 of I Think I’m in Love with an Alien

Such an impersonal response. It’s clear that he’s thinking of something else, and I can’t shake the certainty that he’s hiding something. Yeah, I’ve been talking to everyone online for almost a year, more than six months in the group chat, but how well do I know any of them? I start the car, for the first time conscious that I might be alone with someone I can’t trust. Dammit, I don’t want to regret any of this or to be forced to admit that Mom and Glynnis had a freaking point.

“I’m glad,” I say softly.

“Why are you afraid? You haven’t been before.” The question comes out of nowhere, showing unnerving insight into my emotional state.

Now I have his full attention, and I’m not sure I want it. While I’m ostensibly in control of the vehicle, I’m aware that I’m driving him out of town. Once I stop the car, anything could happen out there. I doubt the homeowners would notice if he overpowered me and dragged me inside.

I could deny it and act like I haven’t noticed anything wrong. But I don’t see the point in lying. While I have my doubts about him—and maybe Jaz too—I don’t want to believe he’s a threat. He won’t hurt me, right?

The truth it is. Please don’t let me regret this.

“You’re keeping something from me,” I say. “And it’s big.”

“Why do you assume that?”

I might as well go all in. “Something happened between you and Jaz at the restaurant. The two of you were different when you came back to the table.”

“Even if that’s true, it’s not a reason to fear me. I’m unaware of any social contract that requires me to disclose all my personal interactions.”

“Wow. Okay. You can say whatever you want to Jaz, but it’s uncool to pursue both of us, unless everyone is on the same page. I thought we…” I let my voice trail off, aware that I’ve made some huge assumptions.

That he’s completely into me and that he doesn’t feel the same way about anyone else. But he’s correct. Even when we had that moment and he said he likes me, then we discussed having a fling, he didn’t promise it would just be me. Us.

Well, shit. I feel like such a dork.

“We’re communicating at cross-purposes. I did learn something startling about Jaz, but it’s not my information to share. And while I do have a secret also, I need time to think.”

“Wait, now I’m confused again.”

What did he learn about Jaz? Maybe she’s ill?

That might explain her lack of appetite. For all I know, he heard her throwing up and she admitted to having cancer. There are so many possibilities. Seeker could be playing head games with me, but why would he bother? When I consider the vibe between them tonight, it doesn’t seem like sexual tension.

Good grief.

I can’t even have a con fling without complicating it. My last girlfriend left because I overthink things and suck the joy out of life. Poppy has called Ravik a fun sponge before, and I felt bad for them. And I guess I’m a bit insecure too. I always wonder what people see in me. That gets old after a while.

“Did you think I had made romantic overtures to Jaz?” Seeker asks.

I mumble in reply. “You both were so weird after going to the bathroom together.”

“That’s because of what she said. It was quite a bombshell.”

Now I feel like a nosy jerk. Why can’t I just take things as they come, be more like Tad? He seems like a happy, easygoing guy.

I could tell Seeker that my last boyfriend cheated on me with one of his students and it’s why I have trust issues. But I don’t want to admit that. I’d rather keep quiet about the worst of my relationships. And now I understand why he’s holding back. He probably wants a fresh start too, not to dump his baggage in my lap and challenge me to keep liking him. That’s what you do when you’re trying to drive people away instead of letting them learn about you organically.

“I’m sorry I made it weird,” I say. “I’m prone to overanalyzing everything.”

“You haven’t done anything wrong. I’m just glad we sorted it out. It would have bothered me if you had driven away with such a fearful mien.”

“I’m still unclear how you knew.” I wasn’t fidgeting, was I? I don’t think so.

“This is the turn,” he says instead of addressing my statement. “Thank you for the ride. We can talk more tomorrow.”

Seeker is out of the vehicle with his bag and moving toward the tiny house he’s rented before I can say another word. From what he said, he doesn’t have anywhere to stay from tomorrow night on. Depending on how things go, I might offer to let him crash in my room, but Tad already invited him. After the awkwardness tonight, he’ll probably go with Tad to the RV.

I hope I haven’t screwed things up permanently. There’s no point in sitting here, however. I drive back to the Rellows Inn feeling like an abject failure. Not only did I misread the situation between Jaz and Seeker, but I questioned him about it. Even if they were flirting or planning to hook up, I’m not his girlfriend.