Page 97 of Kiss Slay Replay

“Willa?”

I think about what I really, really don’t want to say right now, and I say it. “I’m not okay, Ev.”

“Tell me.”

“I’m just…lost. In my life. In time and space. Did I make the right choices? Did I make all the wrong ones? Is it too late for me to be happy? Everyone else seems to have it figured out. Did I miss my chance? Is happiness something I’m even capable of? Am I broken?”

“I don’t think you’re someone incapable of happiness,” he says. “But happiness isn’t something you stumble into by chance, or a level you unlock and ride off into the sunset.”

“No, I know—”

“Do you?” He leans back in the chair, stares out at the lake for a moment before turning to me. “Look. It’s normal to second-guess life-altering decisions. Regret doesn’t necessarily mean you made the wrong choice. It just means you made a choice. You can what if yourself to death, Willa. Ask a thousand questions there are no answers to, that there will never be any answers to. The only—”

“Way out is through. I know.”

“Sure, but that’s not what I was going to say.”

“I’m sorry. What were you going to say?”

“I forget.”

“No, you don’t. Don’t be—”

“So perfect and wise and good-looking? Sorry, can’t help it,” he says, grinning. “What I was going to say is, the only thing that will come from constantly looking back is an inability to move forward. You have every right to grieve your relationship, which, by the way, I love Ravi, but I love you more and I have every confidence you will find someone wonderful if that’s what you want. But grief and happiness can exist simultaneously. That’s just what it is to be alive.”

“You are perfect and very wise and very, very good-looking.” I rest my head on his shoulder. “Thank you, Ev. I love you.”

“Of course you do. That’s enough sentimentality from me. If I say one more sappy thing, I’ll melt like the Wicked Witch.”

“Speaking of wicked witches…”

“Vicky,” we say in unison, then erupt in maniacal laughter.

“All right, Willa the Good Witch,” he says, pushing himself to stand. “To the cabin.”

2

Cassie greets us at the door.

“Thought I smelled gossip,” she says, drawing me in for a hug.

“That’s Evan,” I say. “I smell like bad judgment.”

“And is that…” She sniffs. “I’m getting notes of hell of your own making.”

“My signature fragrance.”

She laughs. “Come in. Let me show you. This is this room…”

“Amazing,” I say, stepping inside and into bad memories. I’m trying my best to tuck my fear away and just be present in the moment. “Love what you’ve done with the place.”

Cassie turns on her heel. “Thank you. This HomeGoods fever dream is exactly my style.”

Evan laughs, throwing himself on the couch.

The same couch that Ravi and I pushed against the door to stop the zombies from coming in. But they got in anyway. They…

I take a deep breath. That was another loop. That loop is done. Over. It’s in the past.