Page 87 of Cackle

She winks and heads toward her room.

“Good night,” she says.

“Night.”

In my room, there are two new lamps and a giant box of chocolates on the nightstand. The extra light contributes to increased coziness. The fear I previously experienced in this space is gone.

I change into the pink silk pajamas that Sophie laid out for me. I eat the chocolates in bed while reading a book of collected poems. When I fall asleep, it’s deep and dreamless.

—

The next morning, over pancakes at the diner, I decide to come clean with Sophie about my most recent stupid decision. My upcoming blind date.

I’ve been nervous about her response, but she doesn’t have much of a reaction.

“Any step away from the past is a step in the right direction,” she says.

“I guess,” I say. “I’m just worried it’s going to be a shitty experience, and then I’ll feel worse about everything.”

“Why? Are you not happy as you are? With how things are?”

“I mean, kind of. Not really.”

She sighs. “You don’t need a boyfriend, darling. You need perspective.”

“Probably.”

“Does the coffee taste funny to you today? It tastes funny to me.” And with that, the subject is changed.

I don’t think about the date again until the next day, when Jill comes prancing into my classroom wearing a bat costume. Apparently, the staff was meant to dress up for Halloween—information I might have learned if I cared enough to pay attention to memos, which I don’t.

“What are you?” she asks me.

“Forgetful.”

She laughs. “You’re so funny. I told Pascal how funny you are.”

“No pressure.”

“You want a Mounds?” She offers me a fun-sized candy bar. I take it. It’s very warm. Molten inside its wrapper. “I have good news. You have plans Friday.”

“Cool.”

“With me! And my husband, Dan. And who knows? Maybe your future husband. Pascal!”

“Again, no pressure.”

“Seven work for you? Have you been to Rhineland?”

“No.”

“You’re going to love it. They have this cheese dip appetizer that might be my favorite thing ever. So seven?”

“Yep. See you there,” I say, instead of what I want to say, which is Kill me now.

“Great!” She hands me another Mounds before flapping out of my classroom.

As soon as she leaves, Madison enters. She’s always early.