Page 49 of The Gods Will Sing Our Song

“Delilah was Kai’s true love,” Emi explains to me. “She was also a Cadillac.”

“You’re right. She was my true love.” Kai lets out a deep, mournful sigh. “I should get James to tattoo her name on my arm with his pen.”

“Your father would surgically remove your arm himself if you got a tattoo,” Ren points out.

“He’d kill you, for sure,” Emi adds. “And then bring you back Dr. Frankenstein–style just to lecture you and kill you again.” She waves a dismissive hand at Ren and Kai and leans toward me. Swathed in a blanket, you can’t tell Emi’s about nine months pregnant. She might as well be me, a young girl on the cusp of adulthood. “What’s your name?”

“I’m Violet. I go to class with Kai and I…” The words trail off, and I’m not sure how to finish. Inextricably, my gaze latches on to Ren. No matter what I do, I keep looking at him, and no matter what, he refuses to look back. “I’ve met your brother.”

“That dope?” Emi asks.

“Yes, that dope.” There. Finally, Ren meets my eyes. I dare to smile at him.

It isn’t a friendly smile. It’s a flirtatious, audacious smile, one that rises to my lips almost of its own accord. He might be annoyed at me, but I’m not going to stay without us acknowledging each other.

It has the intended reaction. A sleek line of orange flinches across his cheek as his jaw clenches. He stares at me directly, nothing hidden away. Rawness and desire fill his eyes, the two emotions much brighter than the embers spiraling through the air. Then he looks away again. I’m almost relieved that he does. It’s like his gaze slipped under a defense I didn’t know I had up and went straight to my heart.

I turn to Emi, awkwardly clearing my throat. “Ren says you like to read. There’s a library where I’m going to volunteer. You should visit sometime while I’m there. Though the current inventory is woeful. There’s not nearly enough books…though strangely there’s four copies of the Farmers’ Almanac.”

“Really? That’s amazing. Farmers’ Almanac has been at the top of my to-be-read list,” Emi deadpans.

“Mine too,” I say, and we giggle. “You know, there’s a man who brings book donations. Are there any you’d like to request?”

“Oh, yes.” A smile breaks across Emi’s lips and her face becomes dreamy, as though she’s talking about her favorite thing in the world. “Anna Karenina. I had a secondhand copy back home, but I had to leave it because it was one of my heaviest books. Choices had to be made.” She’s joking, but sadness tinges her voice. Everyone in camp, no matter who they are, has winnowed everything down to essentials for survival and essentials for the soul. For me, it was my sketchbook and drawing pencils, and for Emi, from the sound of it, it was books.

“I had to read that book for school,” I say, thinking about how I struggled to wade through the giant tome. “Only practical thing I could think to do with a book that big was squash spiders.”

“Squash spiders? With Anna Karenina? I don’t think we can be friends,” Emi deadpans again, and we burst into another peal of giggles. Ren glances at us, and I notice his face soften at his sister’s laughter.

“Oh, but you must,” I say. “You can’t abandon me to only be friends with these dumb boys.”

“Dumb boys?” Kai asks indignantly. “Hey, I’m a gentleman and a scholar, and so is Ren.” He wobbles, contradicting his point. Ren remains impassive.

“It’s true.” Emi grimly shakes her head at her brother and Kai. “I can’t abandon you to be friends with these dumb boys.”

“Good. I’ll hold you to it,” I say, angling toward her. “I hope you can come out again soon. Ren…mentioned you haven’t been well.”

“I think the worst is behind me.” Emi’s hand goes to her stomach, and I finally see the convex curve of her midriff underneath the blanket. “All I want is for the baby to be in my arms. I feel like a powder keg about to go off, and everyone watches me like one, too.”

“Do you have a name for the baby?” I ask.

“I don’t have any boy names, so it must be a girl.” She speaks so confidently that I can’t help but think she must be right. “I like the name Cosette.”

“Cosette?” I’ve never heard it before.

“It’s French. From the book Les Misérables. Cosette is the daughter of a girl who…I understand. It’s one of the heavy books that made the cut. Ren trucked my books from Los Angeles to Santa Anita Racetrack to here for me, even after he hurt his shoulder.”

“And it damn near killed me,” Ren cuts in, overhearing. “I thought I was going to be crushed to death and a giant book was going to be my headstone.”

“What? Use one of my books as a headstone? Never. I’d have to mark your grave with a soda bottle.”

“Don’t worry, Ren. I wouldn’t let her do that,” Kai joins in. “I’d mark your grave with a wrench in honor of my future career.”

“You’re not going to be a mechanic,” Ren and Emi chorus together.

“Violet believes I will, don’t you?” Kai hiccups and turns to me in supplication.

“Sure, Kai,” I say with a grin. Ren and Emi groan while Kai puffs up in victory.