Page 116 of Julian

“Look, I’m no genius and I’m definitely no relationship expert.” He chuckles. “But you can’t let your fears prevent you from reaching for what might actually be good… or even great.”

Simple fucking advice that I once gave him and apparently can’t follow. “But—”

“No buts,” he says, cutting me off. “You don’t get to claim different circumstances. Love is the same no matter what.”

Love? Is that what this is with Harper? Is that why I’m torn up over having lost her?

Grizz hammers home his lessons learned. “It might even exceed what you’ve already had. I know it’s hard to imagine that, but life is crazy sometimes. Great things can come from horrible things. You just have to stay in the game and be willing to see it through.”

Of all the things I was expecting this morning pre-flight, getting a life lesson from Grizz wasn’t one of them.

He glances toward the back of the cabin as boarding nears completion, then pushes himself slowly out of the seat. Before he leaves, though, he pauses beside me one final time.

“Don’t let the fear of losing whatever this could become stop you from pursuing a future with her,” he says. “You’ll carry that regret forever, and that’s no way to live your life. You deserve more.”

I look up at him.

“That’s pretty wise,” I murmur.

Grizz smirks.

“Well,” he says, adjusting the strap of his bag over his shoulder, “you’re the one who told me that in the first place. Might be time to take a page out of your own book, Julian.”

Chapter 30

Harper

There’s depressing and then there’s eating mint chocolate chip ice cream alone in your apartment on a Friday while wearing mismatched socks and spiraling over a billionaire.

I recognize this fully and yet here I am, curled into the corner of my couch beneath a blanket with Beau sprawled across my legs while When Harry Met Sally plays in the background for emotional support purposes. The apartment is unusually still tonight without Dylan here. He’s out with friends somewhere in the East Village, immersed in the glorious chaos of being seventeen and in love with his own life.

I’m happy for him. High school is beautifully simple despite all the turmoil puberty brings. Even the heartbreaks at that age carry a strange optimism because you still believe there’s always another beginning just around the corner.

Adulthood is less forgiving.

I dig my spoon back into the pint of Ben & Jerry’s and take another bite while staring blankly at my phone sitting face down on the coffee table.

Then it buzzes… Abby.

“Mint chocolate chip,” I say by way of answering.

“What number pint are you on?” she asks without preamble.

I glance down at the container in my lap. “Halfway through the first one tonight.”

“Rookie numbers.”

“Not for long.”

There’s a beat of silence before her voice softens a bit. “And still nothing from Julian?”

“Actually…,” I begin, “I have heard from him.”

Abby gasps. “That’s great!”

“No,” I say. “No, it’s really not.”

“Why? What happened? What’d he say?”