Page 54 of Where We Belong

I roll my eyes so dramatically it triggers a stab of pain behind them. I wince, pressing my fingers to my temple. Kaed laughs and it rumbles through his chest like a damn earthquake. I should look away. I really should. But I physically can’t tear my eyes off him. He’s just—ugh.

“So, say the ritual doesn’t kill me.” I clear my throat, trying to sound casual. “After we’re married… bonded… whatever. Do you, like, live with me? Make little royal babies who swear and fight?”

I’m determined not to blush under the intensity of his stare, but an invasive thought of him whispering he’d break me in half runs through my mind. Just like that, I’m warm all over. Goddamn it.

“Firstly, our children will, uh, would not swear. But in everything else, it’s your call,” he says, voice satin smooth. “I know what I want, but if you just want to use me for the ritual or making those pretty green eyes roll back, I’ll do whatever you say.”

“Kaed!” I smack a hand over my face, grinning so wide it hurts.

He leans in, wickedly. “I can make you do that again too.”

I scoff. “You know, men who are actually good at sex don’t brag about it.”

“You forget, I’m not a man, Ashley.” His voice drops a whole octave just to prove his point. And apparently, I’m a very simple girl, because it works. “And it’s not bragging. It’s fact. I know my strengths.” He shrugs.

Danger curls in my stomach at the very obvious fact he’s not bluffing. “And if I didn’t love you. But I still wanted you to serve me. My Volker. The palace. My body, to carry on the royal line. You’d obey?” He nods once, his eyebrows pinching together before he looks away, almost shy. “Until my last breath. You get all of me, should you want it.” I see what he’s given up. Options. Every future but me. And now my stomach’s fluttering like he’s set up camp in there with a jackhammer. “Would you grow your hair if I asked?” His lips twitch like he’s deciding whether to humour me or be honest. And though I’m joking around, I’m interested to know where this power over him stops. Sighing, he says. “I don’t like the feeling of it on my neck. And it’s harder to wash blood out.”

“Ew.”

“But yes. I would. Just for you and your odd obsession with my hair.”

We both laugh, but his words sink deep beneath my skin, and I think of the vendor I charmed for that bottle of alcohol. I make a mental note to pay him back. To give back where I’ve taken. To consider others, where I’ve only thought about myself. Because this feeling is strange. Power. It doesn’t work properly when you’re selfish, and that’s what I’ve been. I haven’t used it for the good of others, and I think that maybe this is what power really is. Something you steward. Something meant to build, not break. And anyone who isn’t terrified of what harm it can cause, shouldn’t be wielding it.

Chapter 50

Kaed

but I kept my eyes on the goal ahead,

and drew from my vow, my pledge.

That simple black dress should let her blend into the shadows, yet it does the opposite. It clings to her curves like it was painted on, every line and dip pulling my focus while we walk to the jail under the blanket of night. I’ve warned her not to engage with Barkus, who had been placed here earlier this morning by Leander and a reluctant Lili. It is more for her sake than mine, though part of me wonders what truths it might find in her.

“Does she love me too. Does she forgive me for my sins? I wonder how she tastes.”

I learned a long time ago that embarrassment is a waste of time. Despite this, I am certain there is a slight flush in my cheeks when Barkus drags itself toward the bars, wincing. Its skin, where it has been scraped raw, has turned a sickly, oozing shade, reeking of infection. “Quiet. You need your strength.” I put my hand out to stop Ashley from getting too close, but curiosity beats in her heart. The creature cocks its long head to the side, it’s too-wide mouth twitching. “They hate me, but I was made this way, Princess,” it wheezes. “I have no choice. It is hard to keep friends when you cannot lie.”

Something close to pity stirs in my chest. But before it can settle, Nyk’s voice brings me back to reality.

“That thing has been driving me fucking crazy.”

“Should have left me where you found me. Should have never drunk my waters. Eira be careful, he’s dangerous. Eira love me.”

I guide Ashley a few cells down. Theron lifts a bruised hand and waves, seated cross-legged on his sleeping mat. What catches me off guard is how Ashley pauses at his cell, then lowers herself to the floor with her back to him, eyes fixed on Nyk instead. There’s something in the way she glances at Theron. Pity of all things. A trait she must have inherited from her uncle. Ashley. The greatest contradiction I’ve ever known. She claims cruelty, wraps herself in dismissiveness, as if wearing it as armour. Yet she’s nothing like the monster she insists she is.

“Where is Rhory?”

I work out a click in my neck when she peers around. Nyk halves the wrap I throw at him and offers the rest to Soot, who yanks it from his fingers with his teeth.

“Released at Aiden’s request.”

“Oh, to be a royal.” I let out a humorless chuckle, shaking my head as I sink to the floor next to Ashley and nudge her with my shoulder.

“You think that’s why he was released? Privilege?” Theron’s voice is hoarse. “Nykholas—”

Nyk picks up a loose rock from beside him and launches it through the bars, hitting Theron square in the head. He slumps forward with a dull thud.

“He won’t stop either,” he mutters, dusting his hands off.