Page 124 of May: Bloom & Bane

“I can still feel him.” She rubs her hand over her heart.

“What if he never comes back? What if that part of me is just… erased, like the Horsemen?”

Vines wind around my legs.

“Sage, he isn’t gone. I promise,” she murmurs.

CHAPTER 37

she called me ash

“I’m going to help you,” she whispers, kneeling in front of me.

“How?” I rasp. “I feel unstable, Eden. I’m losing chunks of time. The other half of my soul has gone silent.”

She studies my face. “Show me.”

“What?”

“You’re afraid you can’t control yourself without Ashán.” She reaches down, wrapping her fingers around one of the vines coiled around my wrist. “Maybe what Ashán needs is for you to free your mind. Maybe the dream dust had a different effect on him.”

Vines begin to crawl up my arms, across my chest, looping around my throat.

“Sage, your vines are…”

“I know.” My breath begins to steady as they tighten around my neck. “I don’t know what’s happening. But I think my body knows what I need.”

One of the vines splits from the collar forming at my throat, trailing down between us like a tether—like a leash.

She stares at it with wide eyes.

“Your magic is making a collar,” she whispers.

I swallow hard, feeling the vines shift against my throat. “I didn’t tell it to.”

“Then why?”

I meet her eyes, and the truth sits heavily in my chest.

“Because I need it,” I rasp. “I can’t control my mind, Eden. I can’t bring Ashán back on my own.”

I glance down at the vine-leash hanging between us. My fingers tremble as I grab it.

“I need you to take this from me.” I hold it out to her. “Please. I need you in control. I need to stop thinking, and maybe he’ll come back. I just need to be⁠—”

I squeeze the leash in my palm.

“I need to be yours.”

She stares at my outstretched hand, not saying anything for a few seconds. And then her fingers close around it.

The vine pulses warmly between us, and the collar tightens in response to her touch.

“Sage, if I take this… if I do what you’re asking, I need to know that you’re not doing this to punish yourself.”

“I’m not. I swear.” I wrap my arms around her hips. “I need you to be the one making decisions, so I can just let go.”

She searches my face. Her worry bleeds through the bond.