Page 156 of Wait for Him

I take a deep breath and lean back, and for the first time since he walked into the room, I don't have to remind myself where I am.

"I needed to know I could do it. That I could walk into a room where you exist and walk back out with every piece of myself I brought in."

His face changes. Just a flicker, but I catch it.

I stand, because that's it. I got exactly what I came for. I don't need an apology from him. I don't need an explanation. There is nothing this man can give me that I didn't just take back for myself.

"I didn't come here to offer you absolution. Forgiveness. Peace. I'm not that type of Christian." I straighten my shirt. "I came to bring you fire and brimstone. I came so my face will haunt your dreams. So my screams wake you up at night wondering whether I know the right people in here, with the right connections, to make sure any uhh…accidents you have are viewed as exactly that. Accidents. Casualties of circumstance, if you will."

His eyes widen and immediately dart toward the officers. He's hoping, I'm sure, that somebody caught the threat behind my words.

Nobody did.

I made certain of how I said it.

"You can't... You don't get to..."

I lean toward him just enough to make sure he hears every word.

"Shhh. Now, now. Don't be scared, Wes." I give him a soft smile. "Rosie's going to take real good care of you from now on. Now that I know you're such a good fucking boy."

His face drains.

I let myself enjoy the tremble in his hands for one second. One. Then I'm done with him.

"Sleep well, Wesley."

I turn toward the door.

"I know I will."

***

"Well... uh." Dr. Knowles places her pen and pad down and pinches the bridge of her nose. "I understand that this was a breakthrough. A monumental one."

"Yeah?" I smile and bounce a little in my seat while she tries to take all of it in. "It definitely was. I'm vibrating. Look." I hold out my hand, which has been trembling with excitement since I walked out of that prison this morning. "This is good, right?"

"Here's the thing." She folds her hands in her lap and looks at me with the careful patience of a woman trying to figure out which part of this conversation to address first. "You kind of threatened his life."

"Yeah?"

She waits for me to elaborate, so I wait for her to elaborate, and after several seconds of us reaching an impasse, I raise my eyebrows.

"Yeahhhh? I wouldn't actually have him killed or anything. I just wanted him sweating bullets thinking I would, you know?" I wave a hand because this feels like a fairly important distinction. "Plus, the only guy I know who could actually pull it off is in a different prison, and he doesn't have connections to any of the gangs where Wesley is. Now, Jade might know a few people if I really wanted to dig into the idea, but it wouldn't be, you know, murder-death-kill. Just a few broken bones. Stuff like that."

Dr. Knowles's mouth slowly falls open.

I wait for the professional assessment.

Nothing.

"Good, right?"

"Rosalie, you understand that everything you said after I wouldn't actually have him killed made this considerably worse?"

"Did it?" I think back over the statement. "I thought the different-prison part showed a healthy separation between fantasy and available resources."

Her eyes close briefly.