Page 47 of Queen of Ruin

“It’s drug money, what do you care?” Mindy flashes a toothy smile at me. “And he owes me.”

“Because he’s the reason you’re high?”

“That’s right.”

“So the money you manipulated out of him before, you spent that on drugs?”

Mindy rolls her eyes. “Duh.”

“How is that his fault?”

Mindy leans forward and flicks her finger against my forehead, forcing me to jerk back. “Because I wouldn’t be addicted in the first place if not for him.”

“Did he put the needle in your arm?”

“Basically.”

“But did he?”

“Yes—”

“No,” Diego cuts in, and his knuckles turn white around the steering wheel. “I’ve done a lot of fucked up shit, but don’t you dare lie like that.”

Mindy sighs dramatically and kicks her feet as she lounges back once more. “Fiiiine. I did it because I was curious, but he bought it.”

“You stole it,” Diego corrects. “You stole it and got high and then blamed me.”

“If you hadn’t gotten high and ignored me, I wouldn’t have been bored!” Mindy snaps back.

Diego’s jaw tics back and forth as if he’s restraining himself, then he nods once. “Sure. Maybe it is my fault. But you made your choices, Mindy.”

“Fuck off. Are you gonna pay me or what?”

Diego suddenly brings the car to a stop and we all jolt forward slightly. He turns to face me and flashes me a weak, sorry smile, then he faces Mindy. “I’m giving you money to keep your mouth shut. That’s it.”

“Don’t.” I reach for him and take his hand. “Don’t pay her for that. It won’t matter.”

“Bitch, don’t interrupt!” Mindy snarls.

Diego meets my eyes, then seems to decide in favor of me and hurries from the car. He moves around to Mindy’s door and opens it, then half-helps, half drags her out.

“I brought you home, Mindy. I’ll order some food for you, okay? Just go and get some rest, please.”

“No! Give me money!”

“Here!” A roll from his pocket is all he has on hand and he tosses it at her. “Mindy, please! Just…” He steps away from her but she stumbles back, losing her balance. When she falls, he visibly fights the urge to help her and hurries back into the car.

“Diego!” She’s back on her feet and slamming her hands on the door by the time he starts the car again. “If you leave, I’ll kill myself!”

Diego grits his teeth and starts driving, leaving her screaming and cursing in the distance. He breathes heavily, almost panting, and for a few long minutes, I get the sense that he’s trying to restrain himself from turning back or yelling.

“I’m sorry,” he says suddenly. “I’m sorry I sold drugs. I needed the money for your meds and the clothes and the food. Mindy’s right… I’m not a good person. I was an addict. I hurt a lot of people. I’ve been clean for five years and it’ll never be enough because I went out and I sold tonight because I had no money left. I’m sorry. If you… If you hate me or don’t trust me or anything, then I understand. I do. I’m sorry, I’m⁠—”

He cuts himself off when I take his hand in mine and squeeze gently. “I don’t hate you.”

“You don’t?” He sounds almost wounded as he speaks.

“I don’t remember my past, Diego. And you’ve been insanely kind to me. I can’t judge you for yours when I’ve no idea what exists in mine. We all have a past life and I see you still trying to help her. So no, I don’t hate you. And I’m not judging you for how you got your money, either.”