Page 47 of Whiskers on Kittens

Lucifer muttered something under his breath, grabbed a stack of papers, and thumped them down in front of me. “This stack contains information on the reasoning behind kidnapping those specific kittens, a list of potential buyers, and things like that. I’m sure you can make good use of it.” Grabbing a different stack, he dropped it in front of Easton with a bang. “I’m sure you can figure out how to turn this into evidence against the CPD, which you’ll organize, write case notes for, and present to your lovely little kitty to work on after the kittens are rescued. This should calm your nerves somewhat, then you can work on the next pile, which creates leads for the FBI and CDC to pursue. I have taken the liberty of having everything authenticated with my brothers and sisters so it’s all admissible evidence. These are the copies. The originals, with fingerprints still intact, will be processed appropriately.”

If all cases could be run with such efficiency, I had no doubt the world would be a much different place. “How do you want me to express my gratitude, Lucifer? This goes far beyond even my base hopes. Thank you.”

“You’re doing my dirty work, so you’re already expressing your gratitude. I’m sure you’ll end up doing my dirty work again in the future.” The Devil went to a different stack. “I have no idea what this one is for, but my brother said it was best left in your hands, so I suspect it’s something about corporations and their wheelings and dealings.”

As intel made the corporate world go round and round, I had no doubt I’d find useful things in the papers. Still, that left us with eight more looming stacks consisting of at least five hundred pages each. “And the rest?”

“Leads on recovering trafficking victims. I have been told to tell you that you cannot save any of these people immediately. The kittens must come first, but you can work on this after the kittens are home safe and sound. You will also have to wait until after the holidays. He said mid-January would be an excellent time to start pursuing these leads, with the majority of the filth being cleaned out of Chicago by late March. While you won’t completely remove the rabble, Chicago will be cleansed enough for my needs by then. The traffickers that escape you will move elsewhere—and they will be dealt with accordingly. I have already tended to that garden. While you will dislike the edict, that is not something for you to pursue. I already have plans to make certain that chapter—and book—are forever closed.”

I waved my hand in a dismissive gesture. “I don’t care as long as it’s being addressed.”

“It is being addressed.”

“What can you tell us about the kittens at this point?” I asked, scanning the first page to determine I held a compilation of receipts taken from the house—receipts that indicated someone had made purchases for clothing for children. “I need a journal, and I might need a tablet and laptop for this.”

With a snap of his fingers, the requested items appeared on the table near me. “Conveniently, I already anticipated your special needs. I also have sufficient supplies for your wolf, although you’ll find his methods to be a bit dated compared to yours.”

“Laptops exist, Easton. Use them.”

“I keep paper records.”

“You can keep paper records as long as you’re also keeping digital records. If you don’t know how to use a camera on a tablet, I’ll teach you.”

“I can handle it.” Easton paused. “Hopefully.”

I’d teach him, although I worried over damaging his already battered pride. “I have a couple of extra rooms we can convert to storage for your papers. Right now, they’re offices, but I can shuffle things around and make it so you can hoard papers if hoarding papers makes you happy. There will be limits on paper hoarding, however. If the papers go back further than legal liability, they will be purged to digital only records.”

“That seems reasonable.” The wolf eyed me. “Maybe.”

“Digital records can be duplicated and stored in multiple locations. A house fire would irrevocably remove your evidence.” I foresaw a battle over the paper issue, but as long as he also kept digital records, I’d keep quiet about it. “How long are we going to be imposing on you, Lucifer?”

“At least a week. You’ll find Manhattan to be an excellent hunting ground for your efforts. Please don’t involve the NYPD unless absolutely unavoidable. I’ve two cindercorns here, and if they find out there is child trafficking going on under their noses, they will destroy half the city before someone can rein them in. The idea is to quietly destroy the active rings here without them being aware of our activities. I will have an appropriate distraction for them in a few months, so when I go to finalize the removal of unwanted elements, they won’t be around to catch us.”

The succubus grinned, and she hopped to sit on the table beside me, giving my stack of documents a pat. “We’re playing a very delicate game of juggling resources. We need certain people doing certain things at certain times. We tend those gardens so the flowers bloom at the most opportune moment. But these traffickers are bold, and they become bolder as they make use of the power vacuums created when we busted out other rings using said blooming gardens. Realistically, you’re cleaning up our mess. But we can’t afford to lose the gardens we’ve planted because of these rogue traffickers—and we certainly can’t abide by leaving these children to suffer. Without our actions, these specific rings would not have formed, so to maintain the balance, it falls on us to deal with them. We’ve chosen you to be our latest blooming garden.”

“I have an actual garden. You could help it bloom when spring comes. Confuse my landscapers!”

Lucifer laughed, and he shrugged. “Sure. If you want confused landscapers, I’m sure I can create something rather glorious. How does the world’s sole true blue rose plant sound to you? And not a lilac, although I will provide some of those as well. I’ll even ask my father nicely to assist with your rose garden. You’ve always wanted a rose garden surrounding your patio chairs, haven’t you? We will make them best suited for Chicago and its weather wonders. Perhaps a rainbow garden, my darling?”

“I do love a challenge. I’ll take care of your father, as He wants me to go have tea with Him tomorrow. He is still rather… miffed.”

The Devil heaved a sigh. “Do you want me to come with you?”

“Will you play nice, wear your best suit, and hold your pinky out? You’ll have to wear your feathered wings, but you can keep them black. You know he loves your feathers when you show them off. You just go with the bat look because you feel it’s more menacing.”

“I’m the Devil, my darling, not a fluffy angel with a morality complex.”

“It’s just for tea. Play pretend and give your father a hug. He could use one right now. Then we can discuss the roses, and He will delight in the idea of her rainbow garden, because it fulfills the promise of His portfolio, to never again lose His temper in such a way mortals as a whole pay for it. Even the universe weeps at what they do, but our people work hard to fix it.” The succubus slid off the table, circled, and stood on her tiptoes to give Lucifer a kiss on his cheek. “We can celebrate the holidays with Him, and I’m sure we can coerce someone into inviting Him to join in and spread the cheer. He will rejoice, for the kittens will be home safe and sound by then.” The succubus’s expression lit up, and she flashed a grin my way. “You might end up having to haul the little ones to your home on Christmas Eve to make all your important deadlines. Invite their parents for your Christmas Eve and Christmas celebration. I can go prepare the downstairs guest suites to be suitable for the kittens and their parents. We’ll install a connecting door between two of the suites. That should suffice. Oh, Lucy. We could install a basement extension for them. We have time.”

“They would encroach on the third layer, my darling.”

“Get permission from the denizens and use their acts to gain their approval. It won’t be a problem. It’s not like we’ll install a direct connection. They’ll just be sharing property lines. They don’t have any direct claim on the land beneath her home. We can get the land rights for the neighboring properties, too. The third layer is below all the sewer lines so we could install quite the nice little niche for them. It would balance the scales.”

The Devil narrowed his eyes, considering his wife. After a few moments, he huffed and he puffed. “Maybe she doesn’t want to have a basement lair.”

I pointed at Easton. “He’s going to crest a thousand pounds once fed properly. Do you know what I need to keep a thousand pound hybrid healthy? A basement lair. I’m going to have to install a gym for him to work out his nerves, too.”

“You could use some time in a personal gym yourself,” the Devil replied.