Page 30 of Booked for Murder

“Yes, Mr. Hampton was briefed on the consequences of the crash before you vanished. I’ve been notified I’ll be undergoing training to handle the situation should you have an incident.”

Great. “You better bring some form of disruptor with you, and it better be a good one, because my method of protecting myself during an incident involves the strategic relocation of blood.”

In reality, I hadn’t used my magic in so long I’d be spending the next few weeks giving myself a refresher course on the basics, which fit well with Bradley’s plans, much to my disgust. I’d also be refreshing my knowledge on Bradley’s basic activities, as the man always found some way to get into trouble.

I didn’t need any more trouble. I had plenty of trouble for all of us with plenty to spare.

“Yes, I’m aware of your ability rating, Mr. Hampton’s concerns your abilities have stagnated, and the uncertainties regarding your magic and its general lack of use since the accident. I’m also aware of the prescriptions you were given, their potential side effects, and so on.”

The so on could mean anything. “It’s been long enough since I’ve had a painkiller of any sort that two of the good ones will knock me flat on my ass. I won’t use them unless it’s really bad, but I’ll take the beta blocker because I recognize when I’m in over my head. I’ll even do the damned exercises at the pace he wants.”

“Good. That will keep things relatively peaceful. So, he tried the orange chicken?”

“And three glasses of milk and a handful of sugar to go with it. He’s probably dying in my bathroom right now. Well, he’s definitely thinking he’s dying right now.”

Ren shook his head and sighed. “I warned him.”

“I’m sure you did, but he picked the restaurant I liked, and the owners likely remember me and my order, so they would have prepared it to my preferences, which was essentially a challenge to make my eyeballs burst into flames.”

“I am curious about why the heat doesn’t seem to bother you.”

“Spicy food has never bothered me. The hotter the better. I like when the spice adds some fire to my blood. I find the taste to be pleasant and the burn to be part of the ride. When I was little, I’d sometimes drink milk after eating spicy food, but I outgrew that pretty quickly. I started drinking water instead so it would be hotter.”

“After that much lactose, he’s going to pass out,” the bodyguard muttered.

For fuck’s sake. “Seriously?”

“Throwing up and otherwise having his body completely rebel on him is tiring. A small amount of lactose will make him sick, but three glasses of milk? He’s going to need a gallon of Pepto, even more water, and a place to sleep it off once the cramping stops.”

“There’s medication for it, you know.”

“None of it works for him.”

“I’d be sorry, except he’s the idiot who decided to eat it anyway. I claimed his share of dinner as his payment for his stupidity. I’ll make him some rice once he’s no longer dying.”

“His family has been following a vegan diet lately, so he really wanted some chicken.”

Bradley might be the death of me at the rate he was going. “For fuck’s sake, Ren. Go buy the man a burger and let him go on a bender. Just skip the cheese no matter how much he whines that cheese is life.”

“Perhaps tonight. He’s not going to be capable of eating anything for a few hours.”

“This is just a demented ploy so he could sleep at my place, isn’t it?”

That earned me a laugh from the bodyguard. “No, he just believed he could handle any foods you can. I really did try to warn him.”

“He’s finally entered his rebellious stage, hasn’t he? He’s not a good candidate for being a vegan, Ren. Have you seen what he does to burgers?”

“I’ve heard rumors, but I have not seen it.”

“I took him to a fast food joint once. I bought five burgers. Big burgers. I didn’t get one because he inhaled the first four and sighed sadly over the last one. I ended up having one of his mother’s salads, portioned for dainty, sophisticated ladies.”

“While you’re a lady, you should not be eating portions described as dainty.”

“You know that, I know that, but Mrs. Hampton? She has no idea how much physical training I did daily making sure her idiot son kept breathing.”

“If it’s anything like my training regime, you would have spent at least three hours at the gym training.”

“I spent five, and I spent an additional hour a day working with my ability while on the move.”