Page 30 of Hard Bargain

They ended up in the parking lot of an In-N-Out, fries balanced on the dash, windows down, the smell of grease filling the car. Tara had ordered for both of them, his usual plus an extra milkshake he hadn’t asked for.

She tossed a fry at him. “You look like absolute shit.”

Knox snorted. “Thanks. That’s exactly the look I was going for.”

“Glad to help. So. Do you want to tell me what’s wrong?”

He didn’t answer, just stared out at the sky.

Tara took a sip of her milkshake. “You know,” she said thoughtfully, “you have that look you get right before you do something really stupid.”

“Do I?”

“Absolutely.” She pointed her straw at him. “Last time you looked like this, you shaved your head at two in the morning.”

He rolled his eyes. “That was your idea.”

“True,” she admitted cheerfully. “And I still maintain it was a strong look.”

He managed half a smile, but stayed quiet.

Eventually Tara’s tone shifted. “Okay. Seriously. Talk.”

He exhaled slowly. “I quit.”

Her head turned immediately. “You quit?”

“Yeah.”

“That’s…” She set her shake down. “That’s not exactly small, Knox.”

“I know.” He rubbed his thumb against his palm.

“What happened?”

He opened his mouth, then closed it. What exactly was he supposed to say?

Hey Tara, so apparently I’m tangled up in organized crime now. I watched people get murdered, got my head thoroughly fucked with by a terrifying mob boss, and now I’m not entirely sure what the hell is wrong with me.

He stared at his hands. “I saw something.”

Tara went still.

“Just…” He shook his head. “Something that made me realize how fast life can go sideways. How easy it is to end up somewhere you never meant to be.”

Her voice softened. “That sounds scary.”

“Yes.” The answer came too fast. He swallowed. “And no.”

Tara leaned back, giving him her full attention now.

“I should’ve walked away,” he went on.

“From what?”

“I can’t tell you.” His lips pressed together. “Any normal person would’ve run. But instead I just…” He dragged a hand over his face. “I turned toward it. I think I might be more messed up than I realized.”

Tara was quiet for a long moment. “Are you in trouble?”