Page 95 of Finding Noah

She sniffled again, then nodded as she took a step back. “You have your gun?”

“Ready and loaded,” I promised, thinking about the weapon in the glove compartment of my car.

“Good. Keep it on you. Just in case.”

“Always.”

She nodded, lifting her eyes to mine. They sparkled and shone, glittering sky blue, like the ocean beneath a summer sun. They reminded me of mornings fishing with Dad. They reminded me of carefree weekends with my grandparents. They reminded me of everything good that had ever happened in my life, where the bad things had been aplenty. All those good things were wrapped up in her, my angel. My savior. My purpose for everything. This … this weekend … it was as much about her as it was for me, even if she didn't see that. It was about getting over a past that had held me prisoner, about moving on and embarking into a future with her, clearheaded and unburdened.

“I love you, Meghan,” I said, kissing her forehead, then her lips. “You're gonna see your mom. You're gonna have fun. You're barely gonna notice I'm gone, and then, when I come back, life will go on like none of this ever happened.”

Her bottom lip began to tremble as she whispered, “I don't know how to sleep without you.”

“Then we're gonna be really, really tired by the time I get back because I know I can't sleep without you,” I said, forcing a smile to pull one from her. “We can even take off from work on Tuesday and sleep, okay? The whole day.” I slid a hand over her body, to cup the juncture between her thighs with my palm. “Right after I devour this spot right here because I know I'm gonna lose my mind not having it for four fucking days.”

“Oh my God,” she said with a laugh, brushing my hand away. “We're in the driveway. The neighbors—”

“Fuck the neighbors. Let them be jealous.” I laid my mouth over hers once more. “We're gonna be okay.”

She kissed me back, then nodded. “I know. I just don't like this.”

“I know.”

I took a step away, taking in the sight of her in my sweatpants and T-shirt. Her tangle of hair sitting atop her head. Her blue, blue eyes and sad, sad lips. Then I opened the door, leaned against the side of the car, and stared for a few seconds longer.

My chest ached.

My gut warned.

“I love you,” I said again.

“I love you too,” she whispered, nodding.

I held her gaze. “I mean it, Meg. I might not be sure of a lot of things, but there is nothing uncertain about the way I feel for you. I love you. It's the one thing, above all else, that makes sense in my life.”

She bit her lip, nodded softly, then whispered, “I know.”

Then, with a hurried sigh, I broke the hold her eyes had on me and got into the car. “Don't stop blowing up my phone,” I told her.

She sniffed loudly, she rubbed her nose, and she said, “I won't.”

“Love you, babe,” I said once more for good measure.

I closed the car door, blew a kiss through the windshield, and backed out of the driveway without looking back. Afraid that, if I stayed for a moment longer, I might listen to that intuitive, nagging little voice telling me to just …

Stay.

CHAPTER NINETEEN

SOJOURN

Welcome to Massachusetts.

I drove past the road sign at the very moment my phone began to ring. I glanced at the screen on the dashboard to see Dad's name.

I released a preparatory sigh, knowing Patrick must've said something, and I braced myself for the berating I was sure to receive as I answered the call.

“Hey, Dad.”