Page 90 of Melt His Heart

Carson: ;) in your sparkly outfit

Me: You’re sooo silly please, is that what you were looking at? My butt?

Carson: i didn’t say that but how’d you know? lol

Me: Cause you’re a man.

Carson: well stop being so sexy

Me: Carson!

Carson: lool js but really you were so amazing

Carson: pls don’t worry too much, you’re going to kill it tomorrow!

Me: Thank you. How was your game?

Carson: we won ;)

Me: Congratulations!

Me: Wait are you out celebrating?

Carson: no…i was worried about you.

Me: Carson……That’s very sweet of you.

Me: You should be celebrating.

Carson: nah this is where i wanna be…i’m gonna call you.

Chapter 30

Ijump up and down to warm up, off to the side in the waiting area of the rink. It’s the day of finals. The arena has begun to fill with onlookers. I had an amazing sleep after talking to Carson, and I’m feeling better, more refreshed. I did, however, tell my mom I couldn’t meet them for breakfast. Because I want to really keep my mind silent. I don’t want to hear what my father has to say about my performance last night. I already know I fucked up.

The pressure to fix it is unbearable.

I need to go into my free skate with a fresh mind and spirit. Carson has been texting me all morning, making me laugh. I know he’s trying to take me out of my head.

Can’t say it’s not working.

But I miss him so much.

I pad into the locker room, running through my program in my head over and over. I go into stretches. After that horrible mistake yesterday, I dropped to rank five, two ranks away from podium. I almost let my negative thoughts eat away at me, seeing that, but I just have to ignore it for now. The other skaters are doing fairly well, so it’s not making it any easier.

I’m just two skaters away from my final chance to leave a good enough impression to qualify for the Olympics.

I get the feeling my mom is keeping distance; she’s always understood what I need without explanation. I appreciate that in moments like this because I don’t think I can survive another interaction with my dad before a skate.

I close my eyes and take a deep breath; the footsteps I hear must be from my coach checking up on me.

“Hey, love.” That’s a voice my body knows very well.

I open my eyes to Carson standing in the doorway of the waiting room with flowers, the same alstromeria from our first date, the same ones he painted me holding.

He steps closer to me, and my hands shake as I reach out for them, “Thank you, you’re so sweet.”

“I missed you so much.” I breathe out, tears threatening to spill down my cheek, but I really don’t want to cry right before I go out on the ice.