Page 4 of Second Chance Summer

Got him again. I want to laugh, but I’m too pissed to laugh right now.

He calls right back.

“What?” I answer.

A long, deep sigh buzzes through the line. Then he says, “You know what I think?”

“I don’t care what you think.”

Completely ignoring me, he says, “I think you’re scared to go because, if we do, you’re going to remember you still like me.”

“Boy, don’t make me dry heave!”

He chuckles. “We should do it.”

“We shouldn’t.”

“She said it was mandatory.”

“It’s not. She’s just big-pantying us, hoping we’d fall for it. Nothing’s mandatory when you grown.”

“I want to do it, Nai. I think it’s a good idea. We’ll be on an island. There will be witnesses.”

I stand up from the sofa and stretch because something about this irritates the crap out of me. Our marriage doesn’t work here. It’s supposed to magically work just because we’re in one of the boujee fifty states? Make it make sense.

And you know what else? While I show my disdain for Hendrick every chance I get, deep down, I still love the man. How can I not? We had a life together. We planned a future. And, when I’m with him, it’s not all bad. He makes me laugh, and that’s one thing I’m afraid of. Being in paradise will make us remember how we used to be. How life was before it all got too hard. Before the bills and the bickering. Before his chewing gave me brain spasms, and the way he left his shoes around the house had me feeling like his personal maid.

Hawaii won’t fix anything. It will be a façade. That, I don’t want because sometimes, when a relationship is over, it’s over. That’s just the way the cookie crumbles.

I can’t say anything further to this effect – well, I could, but why ruin my Saturday morning unnecessarily? I just hang up the phone, but shortly afterward, I get a text from Hendrick:

Hendrick: it doesn’t have to be a big deal, Nai. Just do it, go through the motions if you have to. What do you have to lose?

Lanai: uh…my sanity

I take another sip of coffee. I wasn’t going to respond. I really wasn’t, but he left me no choice.

Hendrick: you said you lost that a long time ago

Lanai: yeah, and since we’ve been separated, it’s slowly coming back…not trying to mess that up

Hendrick: okay, I get it. You don’t want me anymore. I’m the worst thing that has ever happened to you. Let’s just do this and put it behind us. Please.

Gosh, I really don’t want to…

But he’s trying to guilt-trip me, or is this gaslighting? Whatever it is, he knows he’s not the worst thing that has ever happened to me. And I don’t even believe that he thinks that I don’t want him anymore.

I just…

I want the peace I’ve created for myself being unlinked. I want the space to think. I want my home to be a sanctuary without it being Hendrickfied. But at the moment, I think I want what he wants – a chance to go to Hawaii to prove that we’re actually not good together. Perhaps he’d see it, too. Ain’t no island saving this.

Chapter 1

Saturday started with us flying first-class on separate flights like we were celebrities who split up and no longer liked each other while having it filmed for reality TV. I was sitting in the lobby when Lanai walked in like a camera crew was supposed to be following her. She had on sunglasses that were way too big for her face, a white strapless jumpsuit, gold sandals, and red lips that were the highlight of her outfit. Or maybe it was the body. Lanai always kept it tight. She’s very conscious of that, not in a vain way but in a way that showed she loved and valued herself. Apparently, the men in here loved it, too. Every man in this lobby turned to look at her.

My woman.

Something about that pissed me off, because Lanai knew she could get any man she wanted. It was obvious she had options. She had them before we met, and she has them now. Perhaps that’s why she didn’t want to work on the marriage. She already had her eyes on someone else.