Page 4 of Freddie

“No, no, nothing like that!” I croak. Okay, here goes. I click the door shut behind me and lock it, knowing full well that there would likely be several ears about to be pressed against it on the other side.

“I want to start a blog. As a job. A job that would involve my blogging. A written blog, one of those you see online?” Crap, I was blowing it.

“Calm down, Fee. Unless you’re telling us you’re planning on committing a crime with this written blog online, then we will support it,” my Ma reassures.

I look to Da. Fuck, I’ve lost his attention on this as he’s picking at the popcorn again. My Ma jabs him with her elbow discreetly, but I still catch it and cover my mouth not to hide my laugh.

“Out with it, please. There’s a new documentary on those creepy things, you know, whatever they’re called,” my Da grumbles with his eyes still fixed on the bowl. God forbid he needs to give up his documentaries for one minute. I roll my eyes, but only because I know he’s not even looking at me or paying attention to this situation at all.

“I need investment, and before you say no, please look at the business plan I have. I promise this isn’t just a hobby because of lockdown. I’ve put weeks of research into and planning to make it a workable business,” I state, squaring my shoulders more confidently now as I hold over my folder that I’d let Stacy cover in glittered jewels this morning.

Ma takes it and only gets as far as the front page. The one that has the name and what the business entails. She takes a deep breath before elbowing my Da again to show him. I chew at the hangnail on my thumb, red-faced because I bloody well know what’s coming next.

“Oh, fuck off! I knew I should have gone to the bank or taken one of those dodgy loans out or got a sugar daddy! Give it back!” I moan with my hand darting out, annoyed at their laughter as it grows louder.

Da’s shoulders shake, and his eyes shut tight. Red-faced, he coughs and laughs along with Ma. The popcorn is now bouncing about, kernels falling all over the study carpet.

I grab at the file again, but Ma pulls it out of my grasp, so I resort to the only thing I have in my armoury. Grabbing her under the armpits, I tickle her until she drops it. Her tiny frame always being her only weakness.

“Okay, we’re done. We promise, don’t we Keith,” my Ma says to me through the last of her panting laughs.

“Yes, and son, just know we’re giving you the money purely because of the first page. We don’t need to know anymore, thanks for the laugh, it’s been ages,” Da says as he goes into another mixed coughing, laughing fit.

Ma pats him on the back, rubbing circles there to make sure he’s okay before turning her attention back to me.

“We’re proud of you, y’know? Confident, brave, and a sex writer. We couldn’t be prouder! Don’t forget to share the toys those big companies will want to send you. We want investor benefits, don’t we, Keith!”

I stand awestruck at how utterly lucky I am to have such amazing parents. I considered asking them to sign something to protect me from my sisters when they found out, but I hadn’t planned that far ahead in my business plan.

“Thank you, thank you, thank you! Also, ew, never talk about sex toys like that ever again, Ma,” I say as I join them in one big group hug.

Fuck, I was going to do it. I was going to run a blog based on sexual education, interviews with sex workers, club owners, and who knows what else. I was going to put my writing hobby to the test.

It was time to test the fuck out of sex toys and review them so no other would ever waste a crap ton of money for zero pleasure! Look out world, here I come (both sexually and in world domination).

Chapter 5

Simmons

Summer 2022

“Plans for this weekend? I thought we could grab a drink at Nyctra, maybe find you a sub?”

I internally roll my eyes as I stare at my friend and colleague across the table. My last sub had moved away a couple of months ago, something about a new start and finding the one. Good for him. I wondered if the one would enjoy watching him get spanked until bruised and then fucked by a group of Doms on a casual club Friday, just like I used to do for him.

“I can’t,” I tell him as I lift my espresso to my lips. This Parisian cafe near my house was an absolute must when I had time off from working at the university.

I rarely had Sunday mornings free as I was a self-confessed workaholic, but for Arnie, I’d do anything for him. He was like a brother, one I loved and sometimes shared subs with, but never going there with each other. Arnie was all muscle, black ink, and attitude. But his Dom persona wouldn’t work on me because I taught him everything he knew.

“Oh, come on. I have that new boy you set me up with. His forms came back, and he’s got a couple of kinks in common with you,” Arnie argues to my response.

“No. You just want me to come along so you can parade him around in front of me as well as everyone else,” I tease.

The waitress comes over and places down our eggs Florentine before smiling shyly and leaving. We thank her while ordering more coffee.

“Also, I can’t even if I wanted to,” I continue once she has left.” I need to go to the airport. Gerald is flying back from his bum about Europe trip and asked if someone local could get him.”

“Wait. You offered to pick up your annoying neighbour, Gerald? Why? I thought the guy was annoying as fuck?” Arnie asks as he cuts into his poached eggs. I fidget with the napkin across my lap, knowing he was definitely about to judge why I was helping my irritating old neighbour.