Page 167 of Challenge Me

As soon as he turned around, the air grew colder. I found myself wishing there was whiskey in my glass, but that was a bad idea, and not only because I had a game tomorrow.

“What are you going to do about that?” Trav wondered. He absently twirled his finger on the counter, not looking at me.

“I’m not really sure yet.”

“You should probably figure it out.”

“If only I knew how.”

“I’ve got your back, man. Whatever you need. Hell, I’ll blast those reporters online and tell them to back off.”

“Thanks, but I’m not sure more attention is what we need right now, honestly.”

“Both of you will have to grow thicker skin if you’re going to be in this game, Amir.”

“We just have to get past it. Things will level out.”

“There will always be people trying to bring you down. The more you succeed, the more aggressive they become. Even those close to you could betray you.”

“Like you?”

He nudged my knee with his. “Of course not, but don’t listen to me.” He drank the rest of his whiskey before turning to face me. “You need to accept that winning begets the constant threat of failure. Everything you do is fair game for the vultures. But the alternative is losing, so what are you gonna do?”

“Win some and lose some, probably.” I looked around the bar with a frown. “Where’s your boyfriend, anyway?”

Trav unlocked his phone to check his messages. “He was on a call with his mom. If he’s not back soon, I’ll have to hunt him down.”

At that, I chuckled. “Maybe I need to channel some of your relentless energy any time Remi tries to shut down.”

Even as I said it, I couldn’t imagine that it would work. Roman had once given up on what he had with Trav because he couldn’t accept who he was. Remi, on the other hand, knew himself completely. Was that more of a risk here?

I’d never wish for him to be any different, but at least uncertainty could be reasoned with because fear of oneself wasn’t the final product. If there came a point where I had to fight for Remi again, against himself, I didn’t know what it might take to make him stay. And that was terrifying.

What I wouldn’t do was give up. I would fight for him, as much as I’d fight for my own family. If he hadn’t figured that out yet, he would soon enough.

Chapter 46

Remi

I asked the world for quiet breath,

For peace beneath the stars.

But mercy rots where monsters sleep;

I wake to these same scars.

The sound of the bar faded when I stepped outside. I kicked the stray brick into position to keep the door propped open, then leaned against the wall. I clicked my pen, opened my notebook, and started to write. All the other pages were full of poetry. But not this one.

There were a million things for me to write down. A million things and nothing at the same time. It was unorganized, the opposite of the verses I liked to construct. Even when those were chaotic, they came together somehow. I wasn’t sure that this would, but I had to try.

A voice made my head snap up. At the end of the alley, Roman was pacing back and forth. I thought he was talking to himself at first, but then I realized that he was on the phone. He must’ve felt my stare, because after a moment, he looked over at me. His head cocked, then he said something I couldn’t hear. When he headed my way, I groaned internally.

He took out his earbud and put it back in the case. Rocking back on his heels, he took me in, his gaze lingering on the notebook. “Suicide note?”

I snorted a laugh. “You wish. My very existence is an act of rebellion.”

“Well, I might be sorta bummed if our budding friendship got cut short.”