Page 43 of Lost Dreams

“Grandma thinks love is always worth it,” Aurora said instead, maybe because answering Nadia felt too loaded. “But I don’t know how you can ever trust anyone to love you the way you need to be loved.”

Nadia considered this. “Have you reached out to him? Since he left, I mean.”

Although she’d never said Kenny’s name aloud to Nadia, it shouldn’t have surprised Aurora to know that everyone knew who she’d fallen for. News traveled quickly around here. Gossip was like fuel.

“No,” Aurora admitted. “I need to stay focused.” But even as she said it, her heart lurched.

“Don’t be too focused,” Nadia said. “You have to live sometimes, too.”

But after that, Nadia rolled over and finally fell asleep, leaving Aurora alone with her swirling thoughts—and her growing adoration of her little sister, who’d never been so kind.

A full week after Pino and Nadia left for Italy, Aurora was out at the stables, sweeping hay and trying to help the resident stable men and women, none of whom were very interesting to Aurora, but all of whom were incredibly kind and worthy of her help.

Maybe because it was summertime, and maybe because everyone was exhausted after two months at the White Oak Lodge, many staff workers at the Lodge had taken vacation this week, meaning that Aurora was trying to pick up the slack all over the place. But being back in the stables was sort of haunting. It felt like just yesterday she’d sauntered in here, making a mess of things. Even Gwen’s wrist was already healed, without proof that it had ever happened.

Aurora was lost in thought, sweeping and dreaming up her next painting, when a shadow fell over the floorboards. Her first thought was that it was Stephan, one of the stable men, a guy in his sixties who often made her laugh. But when the shadow didn’t move any longer, she raised her chin and found Kenny, standing in the doorway, his black eyes piercing hers.

She nearly dropped her broom.

“Kenny,” she breathed.

Kenny pulled his fingers through his hair. “Can you take a break?”

It was nearly evening, and purple light echoed across the Nantucket Sound. Aurora and Kenny walked slowly, side by side, until they reached a corner of the beach where none of the Lodge’s guests could see them. Aurora studied Kenny’s face, searching for some sign of what he was thinking, what he wanted from her. But her heart pounded so much that she struggled to focus.

Aurora told herself not to panic. “What’s going on, Kenny?” she asked. She might have told him that she’d thought about him endlessly. She couldn’t figure out why he left like that. She thought they had something special. But she knew better than to say any of that.

“He was going to do it,” Kenny said simply. “He was going to publish some of the videos of your family. I told him not to. I warned him. But he wouldn’t listen.”

Obviously, Kenny was talking about Oren. Aurora couldn’t speak.

“I did something pretty bad,” Kenny said. He explained that he’d snuck into Oren’s apartment in New York City, that he’d scrubbed all the relevant Nantucket video files from Oren’s hard drive and also from Oren’s cloud. “All the backups are gone,” Kenny said, rubbing his temples. “I know, because he totally freaked out. He called me screaming, and then he talked about me all over New York, saying that I ruined his career and his life.” Kenny went pale, just thinking about it.

“Oh, Kenny.” Aurora closed her eyes, trying to fathom what it meant that Kenny had obliterated his friendship with Oren, all because of her and her family. “I don’t know what to say.”

“I couldn’t let him,” Kenny said. “Art doesn’t always have to be moral. It can take chances. But it shouldn’t take advantage of people. It shouldn’t destroy people’s lives. Art is never that essential.”

Aurora sat on the sand and wrapped her arms around her knees. The sand was warm and nourishing, and the water was gentle as it lapped along the beach. Kenny sat beside her. The air between their shoulders seemed to burn.

“I’ve thought about you a lot,” Aurora breathed. She could scarcely believe she’d said it. “I don’t know why, but I fell for you right away. I hardly know you.”

Kenny was quiet for a moment. “I felt it, too. I knew there was something between us. But Oren told me from the beginning that he was going to date you. I told myself not to try anything. I had enough other things to think about.” He hesitated, then added, “My mom died last year. At Christmas. I’ve been reeling, to say the least.”

Aurora turned to look at him, shocked. It was strange what people carried with them. It was strange how little you could see from the outside. “Kenny, I’m so sorry,” she whispered.

Kenny shook his head. “I’m sorry I let everything get out of hand with Oren.”

Despite the silence, despite the fact that they seemed not to know what to say or do, he kept his eyes tuned into hers. Aurora’s heart swelled into her throat.

“Are you going to stay in Nantucket for long?” she asked.

“I don’t have anything else going on,” Kenny said.

Aurora laughed, throwing her head back. It was brilliant to laugh despite how devastating life could be. Her grandmother was right: life was beautiful, too. You had to know how to look at it. Like any good painter, you had to trust your own perspective.

“What if we get something to eat?” Aurora suggested. After all, she was Italian. everything had to begin and end in the kitchen, over a glass of red wine.

“You know what? I was just thinking about how hungry I am,” Kenny said with a smile.