Page 33 of Hunted in Hope Town

Her voice was fierce and determined. “But remembering that we’re married, our past together, it means I do trust Ellis,” she said, ignoring the part about where they were.

Ellis studied the doctor as she took in this information, as she took her damn time deciding what to say about it.

“Can you lead me through remembering?” Not pressing about where they were. Ellis wondered if she didn’t quite believe Kirsten’s memory coming back, which worried him since it hadn’t.

No matter what little pieces she thought she remembered.

Kirsten nodded, then began to tell a story—part fact, part fiction. And she was good at it. Playing the role of a woman remembering her marriage. Mixing her truth with little lies. She was damn convincing. Hell, he was almost convinced.

He supposed she’d had to be convincing the past two years just to…exist as someone who felt nothing but a blank in their past. She’d been trying to move through a world that might know she wasn’t who she was pretending to be, but she still had to…exist in it.

He couldn’t imagine how complex, stressful, and just plain hard that had been…probably because he’d been so focused on his own hardships. On all the ways he blamed himself for what had happened.

“Ellis, how are you feeling?”

It startled him a bit, that the doctor would bring him in, concern herself with him. Was it an honest question? Or one probing to see if she could feed information to the Carusos or whoever was after them?

“I know you’ve cautioned me not to push too hard, not to fill in her blanks for her.” He figured he’d take some cues from Kirsten’s use of the truth and offer some of his own. “I’m trying very hard not to, but Kirsten thinks it helps her remember if I fill her in.”

“He’s very resistant,” Kirsten put in. “I thought maybe talking to you together, you could assure him that if it helps me remember, that it can only be a good thing.”

“Remembering doesn’t have to be a good thing, Jessica,” Dr. Leigh said. “You’ve been—”

“I want you to call me Kirsten.” It was a snap, much like she’d snapped at Ellis when they’d first gotten here. She sucked in a breath, let it out slowly, then spoke more calmly. “I want everyone to call me Kirsten. That’s who I am, even if I don’t remember all of it.”

Again, Dr. Leigh took her time responding. “All right, Kirsten. You’ve been through a traumatic event and injury. Your brain is healing, and maybe that’s bringing memories back, but your brain’s job is also to protect you. You might have physical reactions to being faced with traumatic events your brain is trying to shield you from.”

“I haven’t so far. Nothing like the anxiety I felt early on. This is the least…” She trailed off, clearly searching for a word. And he knew it was a real word. She was being honest here, not playing a role. “I don’t know that I feel like myself, because there’s still so much of myself I don’t remember, but I feel less like a shell. I feel more like…like a fighter, I guess. Instead of someone who wants to hide.”

Dr. Leigh smiled, and Ellis saw only warmth in that smile. Nothing suspicious. Nothing to zero in on. He should be happy he couldn’t see Dr. Leigh as the betrayer, but it was frustrating because he felt like he was back at square one if she wasn’t the leak.

“If you trust Ellis, and I have no reason to believe you can’t, then I don’t think there’s anything wrong with exploring things you might remember. You’ll have to work together to make sure you’re not pushing too hard, but if your brain is letting you remember things, maybe it’s ready.”

Ellis had to admit he was surprised. Not just because he wanted something fishy to hold on to, a lead to follow, and there was nothing suspicious about her suggestion. But also because she had been staunchly against sharing anything. For two years she had told him to keep his distance. To be careful. So damn careful.

Was it suspicious? He wanted it to be, but he had a bad feeling it wasn’t at all. “What changed?” he asked her.

“Jessica. Excuse me, Kirsten. My recommendation not to push was based on how little Kirsten remembered, how little she wanted to. In our sessions, she was very averse to trying to relax into what she might remember. She shied away from it—both purposefully and without thinking it through. But if she’s remembering on her own, if she wants to, and is ready to fight for things, then I think it’s best to explore that on her terms. Carefully, but on her terms.”

Ellis was speechless, and he could tell Kirsten was too.

“Look, guys, this is definitely a unique situation. It’s not something I have textbook answers for,” Dr, Leigh said, sounding empathetic and concerned and engaged. “So, in a way, you’ll have to feel your own way through. As with any relationship, open communication is key. I think, given the circumstances, you’ll both be tempted to…hold back, to pretend with each other, to tread lightly. But, to truly move forward, you can’t pretend with each other. You can’t hide. There has to be full trust. Kirsten, that you’re willing to say when it’s too much. Ellis, that you won’t push too hard. And probably more pitfalls as you move through.”

It was strange to find that advice applicable to…well, the marriage they’d had before. Because they had certainly hidden from each other in their own ways. They had a habit of…working around problems rather than through them. Something he hadn’t really realized until after.

So many things he hadn’t realized until after.

“I’d like to meet with you guys twice a week while we move through this,” Dr. Leigh said. “I want to make sure you’re both handling this very traumatic situation in a healthy way. And I’d be happy to schedule one-on-one sessions whenever you feel you need someone to talk to. Preferably in my office.”

Ellis had to clear his throat to speak around the emotion that clogged there—so many different emotions, because this felt real and he’d expected it to be a fraud.

But he still couldn’t tell Dr. Leigh that wouldn’t be happening yet. “I’ll…get in touch with you about working out a schedule.”

Dr. Leigh nodded. “Good.” She asked Kirsten if she had any more questions, and ended the call reiterating honesty and reaching out to her if they got into any rough patches they needed mediated.

Once the video call ended, Kirsten got to her feet. She was clasping her hands, just like she used to do when she was worked up about her mom or sister. An unsolvable problem. Because even when she’d cut them off, that had hurt her. It hadn’t been a solution. It hadn’t solved anything.

She turned to face him, her clasped hands pressed against her heart. She wasn’t crying, but her eyes were suspiciously shiny. “Ellis, she’s not behind this.”