Page 46 of Gilded Curses

She’d once told him he had no friends, and she’d firmly believed it. Outside his family, Orin was a man who didn’t forge bonds with others, but when he said this, she believed him.

For Orin to consider her a friend was a big step forward for him. However, she craved more than friendship from him.

“Someone I care about,” he continued.

His gaze focused on the balcony doors as his brow furrowed. He seemed to be piecing it together while he spoke.

“Someone I can’t lose.” When his eyes shifted to hers again, confusion and something more shimmered in them. “I… I care about you, Sahira. I may not have all my shit together like you want and deserve, but that much is true. I care about you.”

She had no idea what to say.

“And before you ask,” he continued, “I don’t know what it means because it’s never happened to me. But I promise you, this isn’t a game; it’s the absolute truth. I’ll do whatever it takes to make you believe me.”

She could only stand there and stare at him with her mouth hanging open, which she was sure made her look like an idiot. Orin loved his games, but truth emanated from his voice and eyes; he was desperate for her to believe him.

Standing there, she knew the truth. She wanted more from him. She wanted love because that’s what she was willing to give him.

At one time, she believed he could never care about anyone beyond himself and his family, but she’d been wrong. He cared for her, too, and was saying things she never would have believed possible for him.

“I know you want something more, a better understanding of it all, or maybe a commitment….” His words trailed off as he tugged at his hair again.

The distress emanating from him pulled at her heart, but she was still too stunned to move or speak.

“Or maybe you don’t. I don’t know what you want either, Sahira. I was trying to find out by making you think I’d slept with those other women, and it just… it made you furious with me when you learned the truth.

“There are no more games between us. They ended a long time ago. They didn’t end as soon as they should have; that’s my fault, and I regret it. I don’t know what you want from me or what I can give you, but I can assure you that I’ll get you out of this alive, and there won’t be any other women while whatever this is between us is going on. It will be only you.”

Sahira still couldn’t find words as hope and resignation radiated from him. He wasn’t promising her forever; hell, she’d never considered forever from him. She knew she was falling in love with him and had believed she was tumbling over that deadly cliff by herself… until now.

He might not be as far gone as her in his feelings… or maybe he was. He was a fucked-in-the-head dark fae, after all. She imagined that when they started falling for someone, they turned into a complete mess and fought it every step of the way, like him.

And maybe he’d never completely fall. Maybe he’d never be able to give her anything more than this, and she would walk away with a broken heart, but she was walking into it with eyes open.

Maybe they wouldn’t have forever, but they could have now. Besides, given their current situations, now could be a day, a week, or mere hours.

Was she going to keep fighting with him over semantics while a guillotine hung over their heads?

“I’m sure you’re exhausted.” He turned away and reached for the bolt. “I’ll let you get some sleep.”

Like she could sleep after all of this. As he started to open the door, she finally shook off her paralysis and strode toward him. She wrapped her fingers around his arm.

She knew what she was doing and what might come from this, but she didn’t care. She would have now.

And she would have him.

CHAPTER FORTY

“Stay,” she whispered.

Orin studied the determined countenance on her face as she uttered the word he’d longed to hear, but she couldn’t hide the fear in her eyes. He hated that fear because it wasn’t for this place or the uncertainty of their future; it was because of him and the uncertainty of everything they were to each other.

It was a fear he couldn’t ease with promises he couldn’t make. But he would do everything in his power not to hurt her or prove that fear correct, even if doing so went against all his instincts.

When he touched her face, her hand fell from his arm as his fingers caressed her cheek. He’d already memorized every curve and contour of this woman, but he couldn’t stop exploring her.

Is there anyone as beautiful as Sahira? He didn’t think so.

His hand slid back until he found the knot she’d tied into her hair, and with deft fingers, he undid it. The mahogany waves cascaded around her shoulders and spilled down her back.