Page 40 of Insidious

Lily can see something is wrong, but I cannot keep the terror from showing on my face.

My thoughts spiral, fast and chaotic, each one worse than the last, each possibility clawing at me. Despite the winter chill, the shirt on my back is soaked with cold sweat. I can’t breathe.

But underneath all of it, louder than anything else, is one single, devastating thought—

Is that why?

Is that what tipped the balance?

A husband she thinks is unfaithful?

My own weakness. My stupid, selfish need for support.

Is that what pushed her?

What broke her?

I stare at her, at the woman lying in this bed, pale and fragile and fighting her way back to us—

And I suddenly realise the fear is not just that I might lose her. It is that I might be the reason she almost disappeared in the first place.

Chapter 10

Luna

Soft light filters through the beige curtains. So bright, it hurts my eyes. I vaguely have impressions of strangers coming in and out. A nice lady asked me if I would like to sit up. I remember nodding and saying I was hungry. Then I slept again. I remember Isaac saying something, holding my hand. Lily talked while Isaac ran fingers through my hair.

And suddenly, everything comes into focus.

“Lily?”

My voice comes out all wrong, like I have been strangled. A bit like I haven’t used it in days.

“Wh—what? Where … Where is Amelie?”

The words tumble over each other as panic rises like a wave. Lily jerks awake beside me. She was passed out in the chair, folded like a pretzel.

For a long second, she just stares at me.

“Oh my god. Finally. Fucking finally.”

Her voice breaks.

Tough Lily—Lily, who never backs down from anything—is crying. She swipes at her face and stands too quickly.

“I-I’ll get the nurse—”

“What time is it?” I ask, my head still heavy, thoughts lagging behind.

She fumbles for her phone.

“Morning,” she says. “The doctors should be coming for rounds soon.”

I try to sit up, only to still immediately. Pain crests, and I wince as I look down at the tube.

My old enemy—the catheter.

They had to put one in during the caesarean. It was the worst of the worst. A fresh wave of discomfort, of indignity, rolls through me. Why is it back in me?