Page 26 of I Will Always Love You (Maybe)

“The news said it should taper off this afternoon,” Colby says as she slides a bowl with eggs in it to Kona, who’s begging at her feet. “But it’ll still take a few days to get everything cleared.”

“Another few days?” I choke out. Being out here is beautiful, being with Colby is kind of amazing, but I’m not sure if I can handle another few days of this. Even more so, I’m not sure she can handle another few days of this. Even though we’ve quickly picked up a routine, and seem to seamlessly move around each other, there’s no way that I’m not a bother to her and her daily schedule.

“You okay?” she asks, adding a dash more pepper to her eggs. “I promise I’m okay with you being here. Honestly, it’s nice having someone around.”

The pinch in my chest lessens. “I thought you were a certified hermit.”

“I thought so, too,” she says with a chuckle. “Who knows, maybe I’m changing in my old age? I guess you can teach a dog owner new tricks.”

“Um… I don’t think that’s how the phrase actually goes.”

Colby grins as she adds some more creamer to her coffee and stirs. “Seriously, though, are you okay?”

Am I okay? I don’t know. Something in my walk this morning sparked something in me. My brain feels more clear right now than it has for a long time, like the yearslong layer of fog that I’ve been under has fissured enough to let in a small piece of sunshine. I feel like I need another walk. Maybe two, maybe a hundred, but I want to capture this sliver of calming sensation that’s swirling through me.

“Yeah. I’m good. I mean, I appreciate you putting up with me and everything.” I hold the warm coffee cup against my palms. “I don’t know what my problem is. It’s like for so many years all I do is just go, go, go and to now just sit, sit, sit—even with the incredible company—I feel so restless. Like I should be out there doing something, bettering myself, finding a hobby. I don’t know. Something.”

A playful smile appears on Colby. A moment passes when she lifts her brow, and says, “Well, I do actually have an idea… if you’re up for it.”

With that look, and that tone, my legs shouldn’t be warming the way they are. But my physiological response has a mind of its own. Honestly, I’ve been kind of a rock with being around Colby and that phenomenally luscious mouth of hers, if I do say so myself, and have been only allowing a few naughty thoughts to seep in. “Oh yeah?” I say, matching her delicious tone. “What’s that?”

I know we aren’t ready to do anything like that again, but is there any other better way to pass the time?

No, no there’s not.

“Well… it will certainly occupy us for a while and get out some of that energy you’ve been hanging on to,” she says.

My eyes grow wide. My cheeks flush. My heartbeat thumps. I think I might love everything about this. “Okay, I’m in.”

“Perfect,” she says and lifts from the table. “Follow me.”

SIXTEEN

JOSIE

So… admittedly, when Colby said Follow me with a cheeky grin, I had a brief panic that she really was going to lead me to the bedroom. Then my mouth started watering, anticipating what we might do in the bedroom. And then, I was simultaneously hit with half disappointment and half relief when she led me to the closet filled with winter gear.

“Make sure to bundle up,” she says, handing me industrial-size gloves and snow pants.

“What exactly are we going to do?” I ask as I pull the snow pants on and scoop my arms under the suspenders.

“We’re gonna go chop some wood.”

Okay, the grin on her face is too cute to ignore. I think she was waiting for me to balk at this idea, or laugh, or ask if she was serious, but instead, I continue layering up and a few minutes later, after we both reassure Kona that we’ll be back in not too long, we step outside and trudge through the pathway leading up to the shed. The snow has stopped falling almost completely now. Instead of the torrential downpour of flakes, it feels like someone is giving the clouds a good shake to get the rest out.

Colby tugs on the large barn doors, and the daylight illuminates the inside. It’s surprisingly clean and organized—much different than the one I had in my childhood home—with garden tools, jackets, different axes, and saws. And an ATV and snowmobile.

How does Colby do all of this stuff on her own? There is something so deeply impressive—and admittedly pretty hot—about this woman being so fierce and independent that she hops on this ATV or snowmobile and tears through the woods, rather than hiring out or living somewhere with less maintenance.

Colby tosses some rope, a few different-sized axes, and a bag in the small trailer, throws a leg over the seat, and backs the ATV out of the shed. “Have you ever ridden on one?” she asks.

I shake my head. “I thought you aren’t supposed to use an ATV in the snow?” I’m not worried… not really, anyway. I normally love things like this—trying something new that gets my heart pumping. But I’m also not a huge fan of being stranded in the middle of nowhere in the aftermath of a blizzard. I’ve seen enough survival-style shows in my day to know I’d be the first one voted off the island.

“Hey, I got you, okay? I’m not going to let anything happen.”

She says this with such a mix of authority and empathy that I feel it in my stomach. Something in those words trigger something deep in me, and I know right now is not the time to process what it is, or why it’s hitting me so hard. I believe her. She really won’t let anything happen to me. For the first time in a long time, I feel safe.

Colby’s beautiful eyes fill with concern when I don’t say anything. She’s probably thinking I’m skittish, but it’s not that. It’s that I have such an overwhelming urge to hug her and thank her for being here with me, that it’s rendering me silent.