Page 41 of I Loved You First

“What does that mean?”

“It has nothing to do with the fibroids. It’s an entirely separate issue. But basically, sperm won’t be meeting any of my eggs without another more involved surgery to try to fix my fallopian tubes or without the aid of IVF.”

“Lots of couples have success with IVF.”

She nodded, lifting her head to meet his gaze. “But a lot don’t.”

He steamed out a breath, seeing so clearly the devastation in her eyes. “A lot do, Fi.”

She sat up, staying close, but no longer leaned against him. “I’ll most likely need to have another procedure to make sure there’s no scarring on my uterus from the surgery I had. If there is, and it’s significant, implantation might not even be possible.”

“That’s what the fertility specialist said?”

She nodded. “She agreed with Dr. Miller’s initial findings. She wanted to do more tests, but I never made the follow-up appointment. I saw the images of my fallopian tubes. I understand my odds of becoming pregnant. When I’m ready to travel that road, I’ll call Dr. Breck back, but at this point, I’ve had enough of being poked and prodded.”

“I can imagine.”

She said nothing for several moments as she stared at her lap, and her breath hitched. “Mostly, I just feel broken—like I’m damaged. I feel like my body’s betrayed me.”

“Hey,” he said, gently tilting her face until their gazes met, watching as more tears slid down her cheeks. “You are not damaged or broken. You’re perfect whether you can make babies or not.”

She closed her eyes as another tear fell. “Thank you for saying so.”

“I mean it, Fi.”

She nodded, easing back as she wiped at her cheeks. “Gah, I don’t want to talk about this anymore. It’s so depressing.” She wiped at her face again, struggling to smile. “Let’s talk about something else. Let’s talk about you.”

He nodded, willing to do or say just about anything to make her less sad. “All right. What are we talking about?”

“I don’t know… Tell me about being a single dad.”

He crossed his eyes as he puffed up his cheeks and blew out a long breath. “How much time do you have?”

She chuckled. “I have plenty.”

He blew out another breath. “It’s hard work—the most important work I’ve ever done. But Brady’s worth it.”

She hummed in her throat. “You make it look easy.”

He huffed out a laugh. “I appreciate you saying so, but it’s definitely not easy.”

She snagged another piece of watermelon with her fork. “What are your favorite moments?”

“When we read together. Or when he snuggles up in bed with me on the weekends and we have our talks. Five-year-olds are pretty damn smart.”

She chuckled again. “Brady is definitely smart.”

He nodded with feeling. “Too smart sometimes.”

“I like your favorite moments. They sound nice. Like something you’ll both always remember.”

He nodded again. “It makes me sad to know he won’t always want to do that—have our chats.”

Her eyes softened as she touched his hand. “You have time.”

“I’m trying to treasure it.”

She nodded. “What’s the worst thing about being a single dad?”