Page 75 of Lyrebird

‘Okay, okay,’ Jack pops a chewing gum in his mouth.

Laura turns her attention to the walls. Framed discs, awards, artists she recognises, others she doesn’t, his own from his band, Jack Starr and the Starr Gazers.

‘You like music?’ he asks.

She nods. She makes the crackling sound of vinyl, like logs burning in a fire, that comfortable, cosy, memorable sound.

His eyes widen. ‘Jesus. You listened to vinyl?’

‘Mum and Gaga loved jazz. Billie Holiday, Miles Davis, Nina Simone, Louis Armstrong …’ She hums the tune to ‘I’m a Fool to Want You’, but her humming is deep and gravelly, not the voice of a young woman. ‘Gaga’s favourite song,’ she explains.

He shakes his head, in awe.

Uncomfortable under his gaze, she looks away.

‘I’m guessing you’ve never been to Australia,’ he says.

‘No,’ she smiles.

‘Well, they want you. Boy, do they want you. Biggest talk show over there has invited you. There is no Australian creature, with the exception of the koala, more firmly established in the public regard than the lyrebird. But you couldn’t be more different. The koala is a hundred popstars you could name, all quaint and approachable, but you are elusive, exclusive. Man, you coming along is … well, it’s the best timing for us, for the show. We’ve been trying to get into the Australian market for a while and I think this gives us a way in. The networks wanted to see that we could stir up public interest, and now they have. One hundred million views …’ He checks his phone. ‘One hundred and eleven million views.’ He laughs. ‘Anyway, you don’t need to worry about any of that, you just get to go on a free trip. Go on the country’s biggest chat show. Pose with a lyrebird for the press. Do a magazine shoot. Then fly home for Monday night’s semi-final. What do you think?’

‘It all sounds … incredible.’ She grins, unable to believe it. ‘Are the others coming?’

‘What others?’

‘The other contestants. I don’t think most of them like me very much.’

‘They’re jealous.’ He smiles. ‘It’s a competition, you blew them all out of the water. And no, they’re not coming. This trip is all about you.’

She chews on her lip, concerned about this.

‘Don’t worry, they’re all doing interviews too. They’ve probably done more, in fact, but you’re getting all the coverage. If I were to ask any of them to come on this trip, they wouldn’t think twice about leaving anyone else behind. It’s a competition, Lyrebird. So, you need to get your passport details to Bianca so we can take care of your flights.’

‘Oh … I don’t have a passport.’

‘That’s okay,’ he says encouragingly. ‘We have a few days, we can organise one. The show has had to organise emergency passports before. The passport office are good that way. Fans of the show. All you have to do is give Bianca your birth certificate. Don’t worry if it’s in Cork, we can pick up a copy from the Dublin office.’

Laura stares at him, open-mouthed, not sure what to say. He takes it the wrong way.

He laughs. ‘I told you not to worry, this show takes care of all your needs,’ he holds his hands out grandly.

Laura swallows. ‘No, it’s not that … I don’t have a birth certificate.’

His smile fades.

Bianca, Curtis and Jack sit in the office in what Laura understands to be a crisis meeting. Curtis and Jack watch Laura, Laura looks at Bianca as she reads from a list of paperwork required to attain a passport.

‘Baptism record?’

‘She already said no,’ Jack says, the irritation creeping in.

‘School records.’

‘I was home-schooled.’

‘Yeah, but state exams would have you on file.’

‘I didn’t sit state exams.’