Page 89 of Apparently, I’m Trouble

“Yep.”

“I bet you were cute.”

I shrugged, biting into my own slice. I spoke around my mouthful. “I wouldn’t say that.”

“Girls must’ve followed you around with their notebooks, asking you to help with their homework,” she teased.

“If they did, I didn’t see it.”

“Tash was the only woman you ever really noticed then?”

My chewing slowed. This was the second time Mia had brought our conversation back to Tash.

“Not… really. My relationship with Tash wasn’t romantic.”

“But you had a daughter together.”

I put the pizza down and rubbed my hands over the box, letting the crumbs fall into it. It was possible that Mia might need my full attention here.

“Growing up, I didn’t really talk to a lot of people. I had Rochelle. Cole, the older kid next door. And Tash lived in the house behind mine. Tash and I were close, but we were just friends. We went everywhere together, mostly because she wouldn’t leave me alone. You might’ve noticed this already, but I’m not exactly the most social person.”

“Oh, I’ve definitely noticed.”

“We went to college together, and she used to drag me to parties sometimes. One night, after I had a rough talk with my dad–”

“A rough talk?”

“Yeah. He didn’t want me to go into programming. He wanted me to do something medical. At the time, he’d just been diagnosed with a chronic musculoskeletal issue, and he had to change his whole life because of it.”

Mia put her pizza down, wiped her hands together, and crawled into my lap. I wrapped my arms around her. I made peace with my career years ago, and now, as long as I was in control of who I treated and who I worked with, I was fine with it.

“It’s all right. I like what I do now. But at the time, I was pretty upset. I didn’t want to let my dad down. So when Tash dragged me to a party, I got pretty drunk.”

“How drunk are we talking here?”

“Pretty fucking hammered. I was drunk enough to sleep with Tash, and I’d never thought of doing that before.”

Mia sketched light circles on my chest with her fingertips. “Now, I don’t know if you know this, but you’re pretty hot.”

I snorted. “Well, thanks.”

“But your stunning daughter couldn’t have gotten her good looks just from your side. Her mother must’ve been beautiful. What was it about Tash that wasn’t… it for you?”

I shook my head, at a loss. “I don’t know. You’re right, she was beautiful. And we were pretty close, but she just wasn’t the right one.”

I grimaced and laid my head on her shoulder. I spoke into her soft cotton shirt as her thigh pressed into me. “I shouldn’t talk about her like that.”

Mia ran her hand through the hair at the nape of my neck. “No, it’s fine. I get it. It’s just hard for me to believe. That this beautiful best friend of yours, who you also shared a daughter with, wasn’t the love of your life.”

I lifted my head and looked at her, searching for something–some kind of feeling that told me she was here, in the same place I was, feeling the same thing. But her expression wasn’t easy to read.

“I don’t think I knew what love was, Mia.”

“No?”

“No. Not until I had Kira.” And met her teacher. “But I miss Tash all the time.”

Her gaze softened. “I can’t imagine how hard it’s been to live without her like this.”