Page 62 of A Well-Trained Lady

She gave a small nod, appearing relieved by Augustus’s agreement.

“When do you leave?” I asked, attempting to conceal the disappointment in my voice.

“I’m afraid I cannot delay. Owen expects the hearing will take place within the next fortnight, and all evidence must be compiled before it begins.”

Now it was my turn to offer a timid nod in lieu of a response, trying to convince myself it was for the good of both of us that he was leaving. I needed to fortify my defenses in his absence.

Augustus glanced around at our solemn expressions. “Come now, it should only take a matter of days.”

I forced out a smile for his sake. “We ladies have much to occupy our time, don’t we?” Ruth and Sarah nodded in unison, and I looked back to Augustus. “Though I may need Mr. Treynor to assist me with a lesson or two in your absence.”

Augustus’s lips lifted into a glorious smile, just as I’d hoped. “I must insist you hold off on those lessons requiring the aid of a gentleman until my return.”

Ruth and Sarah laughed, but I gave a small lift of my chin. “Then you’d best be on your way so that you may return before I am forced to press on without you.”

“You wouldn’t.”

I lifted a brow.

“Very well.” Augustus stepped in front of me and took hold of my unbandaged hand. He paused. “Do wait for me, Bella.” I was certain he spoke of more than the lessons.

My heart pattered about recklessly, and though I tried to keep myself from agreeing, my attempt was halfhearted at best. “I will.”

He lifted my hand and placed his lips to my knuckles. So tender was the gesture, I dropped my gaze for fear he, or one of our onlookers, would glimpse the undeniable pleasure that coursed through me because of it. When he released my hand, I clasped it in my other, waiting for my self-control to return. When I finally looked up, he had just kissed his mother’s cheek.

He offered me one last adoring smile. “Take care, all of you.”

“You also,” I said, and he disappeared through the open door.

The room fell silent, and we listened to his muffled footsteps retreat down the carpeted corridor. A strange desire to go after him flooded over me, but I disregarded it. What good would it do either of us?

“I still cannot believe you and Augustus nearly kissed,” Ruth chirped, acknowledging the very topic I most wished to avoid in his absence.

Mrs. Brundage pressed her lips together. I wondered if she meant to say something, but then she took a step backward. “I will go see about Cook packing a little something for Augustus to take with him. Do excuse me.”

Relief flooded over me. The moment she left, I pulled Sarah inside with me and Ruth and closed the door.

“Ruth, you must not speak of it.” I released a breath. “It was a moment of weakness, that is all.”

“So you do not love him?” Ruth asked, sincere disappointment in her features.

I walked to the writing desk, righted the sewing basket, and began filling it with the spilled contents. “It would not matter if I did. A union between us is impossible.”

“But why?” Ruth moved to my side to aid me in my cleanup.

Uncertain how I could even explain the situation without revealing too much, I shrugged. “It’s complicated, Ruth.”

“But if you love each other—”

“No,” I said, a tad too forcefully out of frustration. “Forgive me. It’s just that love is not an option I can consider. I am expected to marry someone of equal rank, if not higher. Someone with connections and a fortune—a gentleman like Lord Thorton.” I paused, wishing I could explain that love was not enduring. That I’d witnessed its brittleness too many times. But Ruth would only assure me that Augustus would always love me. I knew better. Love always faded. Besides, Augustus had once chosen Ruth’s happiness over mine, and though I could not blame him for it, it would be naïve to think it could not happen again with someone else. No, it was safer to marry for convenience. “I am told a mutual fondness often grows in such arrangements. And that is enough for me.” It had to be.

“My parents never grew to love one another.”

I took Ruth’s hand in mine. Though I could not say as much, nor that Augustus had been my informant, I understood her plight more than she knew.

Sarah stepped to my other side, handing me the last of the ribbons she had gathered. “So there is no hope of you becoming my sister?”

My heart nearly broke. “If not sisters, then we shall always be dear friends.”