Page 113 of Memory of Ashes

He’d go for their sake.

The remaining soldiers of the two armies prepared to ride home. Elthar left a small group behind to monitor the forest.

Ruven rode beside him at the front with Elthar and Eleandor.

“Why did the creatures stop when we left the forest?” he wondered aloud. “It makes no sense. They chased us in the human lands.” He paused, thinking. “Perhaps they were trying to get us away from the rift.”

“Guardians of the realm,” Eleandor said.

*

The towers of the High City loomed in the distance. Rooms had already been prepared for their arrival. Casyl made sure his men were well cared for and then went to his room to rest.

He wanted to sink into the dark oblivion, but the faces of Amelia and Tharos came to him unbidden. He’d failed them both.

Alone in the dark, he could finally grieve for her. His vision blurred. Only then did he realise that he was weeping.

Tears pooled in his eyes as he tried to hold them back, but a few escaped and ran down his face for the first time in centuries. He was a commander, and now a king. He had led thousands of men into battle, stared death in the face and defied it. Yet now he sat on the edge of his bed and fell apart. He had defied his own death, but he could not face hers.

When he finally fell asleep, she haunted his dreams. He never wanted to wake up.

He awoke to sunlight that streamed through the window across his face. None of this was real.

Why did he continue to stay in this limbo? He remained in this world, unable to find anything left in it for him.

He made his way up the winding staircase of the tower until he reached the door to the roof. He walked out into the sunlight that shone down onto the rooftop terrace. The kiss of its warmth, which he’d once enjoyed, now failed to reach him. A breeze curled around him as though urging him back as he approached the edge.

He looked down at the city below, admiring it. This was the first time in centuries that he’d been able to look upon the streets of the High City without disguising himself, understanding now why it was known as the Bowl of the Gods. The city was so high up, and the sight from the tower gave him the perfect view of the crater into which the city had been built.

Had he done enough good in his life to be allowed to ascend, or would he descend into the Shadowlands? The thought of spending eternity in the shadows gave him pause.

He closed his eyes. It would only take a step.

“Enjoying the view?” Ruven asked from behind. “It’s quite something, isn’t it? I’ve never seen it from this angle.”

Casyl opened his eyes and exhaled as Ruven came closer.

They stood together for a moment in silence.

“She might not be dead, you know.”

Casyl glared at him. Had he said that, knowing it would stop him? Casyl avoided Ruven’s gaze and looked out across the city.

“I saw it happen,” Casyl said through gritted teeth. “The rift closed.”

Could she still be alive? A flutter of hope bloomed in his chest.

“There are priests downstairs talking to Elthar. This has caused quite a stir.” Ruven chuckled, suddenly turning serious. “But if you think of doing this again, for even one moment, of leaving me here alone to deal with this cursed existence, I’ll kill you myself. Whether I descend or not. If you want to talk, I’m here. If you want to fight, I’m here. But this, I won’t let you do.” And he stood waiting until Casyl turned and walked back through the door to the stairs.

Ruven led him to the meeting that was taking place between Elthar and the priests. Casyl hated the priests.

They became quiet at his arrival, regarding him with distaste when he entered.

The high priest sat before them in his blue velvet robes. He recognised the man beside him, the scholar. He’d been with Amelia the day that Casyl had taken her from them.

“Ah, Casyl,” King Elthar greeted him. He was now dressed in the splendour that showed his rank. “We were just informing the priests of everything we’ve recently learned.”

Casyl barely listened as Elthar explained what he’d told the priests. He flinched as Elthar spoke of the rift closing.