Page 41 of Here We Go Again

dad i will literally leave this chat if you send even one eggplant

Becca

I really feel like this conversation got away from us

Mom

And you’re surprised?

Becca

Not even a little. I’m going to bed. Tell Kim I said hi.

Mom

I definitely will. Is it weird for you? That I’m seeing her?

Ha. If mom only knew.

Becca

It’s a little weird? But it doesn’t bother me. I always liked her. I hope you have fun.

Mom

I’m sure I will. Love you.

All of you.

I’m laughing as I close out the text thread and put my phone back on the nightstand. My family is ridiculous. But I didn’t pick up on any lingering animosity toward Theo, so that’s good.

It doesn’t occur to me until I’m almost asleep that if I didn’t hope to spend more time with Theo, I probably wouldn’t care what my family thinks.

My alarm wakes me from the best sleep I’ve had in months. Most of the apartments I stay in are short-term rentals that come fully furnished, so I’ve slept on a lot of crappy mattresses. Maybe I’ve just forgotten how comfortable a bed can be, but I swear this mattress was made in heaven. Even the one at Indigo’s doesn’t compare.

If I weren’t so determined not to overstay my welcome, I might go back to sleep. Indulge just a little longer. Then again, now that I’m awake and rested enough to have a clear head, I’m probably too aware of where I am to relax again.

I slept at Theo’s apartment.

I called Theo.

And weirdly enough, I didn’t even hesitate. He always did make me feel safe, so maybe I shouldn’t be surprised. But now, I’m second-guessing everything.

Why didn’t I just let Rory get me an Uber? Why didn’t I call about getting my own account unlocked? Honestly, it wasn’t even that far. Why didn’t I just walk?

I mean, the rain was terrible. But a little water never hurt anyone. I would have been fine … probably.

But I just felt so frozen. So alone.

And then Theo came, and he was kind and gentle and reassuring, and then the way he looked at me, the sincerity in his eyes when he told me he was sorry about the breakup … I can’t truly regret calling him.

But where does that leave us now?

I have to go out there and face him.

I have to put on last night’s dress and go talk to Theo Williamson like it’s no big deal.

I tug a pillow over my head and press it against my face, giving real consideration to my earlier plan: I’ll never get out of this bed.