Page 80 of His Choice

“It wasn’t totally unselfish on his part,” I explained. “He has hopes of being an actor. I think he saw it as an opportunity to come off as the good guy with the viewers and generate positive buzz about himself. He probably already built up a fan base with his good looks and charm.”

“And you think the producers let him slam them during his last confessional? That’s hard to believe,” Adam observed.

“He thought that through.” I glanced at my watch. “Tonight’s episode already aired. Remember, the renovation work was taped, but the confessionals were live. I don’t know how they could have stopped him. He abided by the contract, withholding the information about being straight until his last confessional. Criticizing their decision to cast him and thwarting their efforts by faking an attraction to Mikey weren’t forbidden, since the producers never anticipated he’d do either.”

“I can’t believe it,” Josh stated, appearing troubled. “I was so sure Aaron really was in love with Mikey.”

“Well, Cliff said Aaron’s trying to become an actor,” Myles reminded his son. “I guess he’s proving to be a good one.”

Josh seemed unconvinced. “I thought Mikey was in love with Aaron, though.”

“Me too,” my mother added. She turned to me. “Don’t get me wrong, Cliff. I think that boy likes you just fine. And there’s no question he finds you attractive. But when he and I spoke in your library, the way his face lights up when he speaks of Aaron…”

“Is the way I’ve been waiting for Mikey to look when he’s with you,” Mitch finished. “I agree with Josh. I’m beginning to believe Mikey wishes that Aaron’s act of falling for him isn’t pretense.”

“But if Aaron is straight, Mikey’s hopes are for naught,” I pointed out.

“‘If’ being the operative word,” Myles noted, before turning to look at his husband. “Sometimes people find out later in life that they’re more fluid than they realized. It took this guy decades to learn he’s into men.”

Adam jerked his head back. “I’m into you…not men plural.”

“And Aaron could be into Mikey that way and just not have admitted it to himself yet,” I added. “I know. At this point, I’m not sure whether he’s acting or not. But what if he is? And I don’t choose Mikey? The poor guy will be crushed, with no hope for a relationship with Aaron or me.”

“You can’t choose Mikey for that reason,” Simone implored. “Cliff, if you’re beginning to think Mikey is in love with Aaron, you shouldn’t settle for being someone’s second choice. This is too important.”

“I hear you,” I acknowledged. “But we don’t know for sure that I’m his second choice. Maybe he adores Aaron like a brother and that’s why he looks at him that way. What I do know is, I really like Mikey. He’s sweet. I think with every accident he has, he becomes more adorable. I told him so earlier so he wouldn’t feel as bad about what happened today.”

“Yeah, I can see how someone into twunks would find Mikey fuckable, for sure,” Keller agreed. “But do you prefer him to Brighton? Now that’s a stud, and I’ll bet he’s great in bed.”

Mitch turned to his boyfriend with feigned outrage. “Should I book a room for you and Brighton at a nearby motel?”

Keller had a guilty expression before grinning. “No. Don’t be crazy. All the motels within a twenty-mile radius are fleabags. Pull out your phone and find us a room in Manchester.”

Mitch scowled, eliciting a laugh from his boyfriend. “You’re a brat.” He then whispered something in Keller’s ear. Based on what I had overheard once before, I imagined it involved spanking. Keller’s eyes lighting up made me suspect I was correct. The way Keller sometimes pushed Mitch’s buttons made sense now. I was glad that it wasn’t because he actually disrespected Mitch, which would have seemed at odds with how Keller seemed to worship the man.

“I’m not talking about who’s fuckable, Keller. They’re both sexy in different ways,” I clarified, once everyone’s attention returned to me. I glanced at my mother. “Sorry, Mom. That’s kind of a gross thing to say in front of you. Anyway, my point was that I could see a relationship with Mikey.”

“But more so than with Brighton?” my mother asked.

“And there’s still a chance you are Mikey’s second choice,” Adam insisted. “You haven’t answered whether you’d be okay with that.”

“But should Cliff make his decision based on that assumption?” Myles challenged, before I could speak. “Everyone talks about how Mikey looks at Aaron, but from what I’ve seen, the guy sure seems to like Cliff, too. If what Mikey feels for Aaron is deep affection, it doesn’t trump romantic love he could be developing for Cliff.”

“True. But Brighton seems to be falling for Cliff, from what I’ve seen. Wouldn’t he be the surer bet?” Ezra noted.

I groaned, wiping a hand over my face. I hated being confused, and I detested even more that I was in a position where I couldn’t make everyone happy.

* * * *

The conversation had turned to various topics, and I found myself not paying close attention. I walked out of the sunroom into the evening air. It had cooled down considerably from earlier in the day, and I was glad I had on a sport coat. I headed down toward the pool and was surprised to see Brighton standing by it, looking troubled.

“Is it okay if I join you?” I asked, as I approached.

He turned toward me. His eyes didn’t match his smile. “Of course.”

“Aren’t you cold?” The man was wearing only a black button-down shirt and slacks.

Brighton chuckled. “I’m from England. This is refreshing compared to the heat I’ve experienced this past week.”