Page 11 of Saved By the Pitcher

“Stop it! I don’t want to.” James sulked.

Billy shrugged. “Dude, check out this one where he’s looking at you. I think he’s attracted to you. It’s like you could add animated hearts coming from his eyes and nobody would question it.”

“He wasn’t paying attention to anyone else in the dressing room when he came in. His eyes were fixated on you,” Nadia noted.

“Well, he did come to meet me, so wouldn’t that make sense?” James shot back.

“He was eyeing you like a desert wanderer eyes a food cart selling ice water,” Maria said. “He didn’t look at his date that way.”

James mumbled, “Even if all of you are right, what makes you think I want to hook up with him?”

The three others laughed, irritating James even more. “Bro, you were acting like one of the Southern damsels in a 1940s movie. All shy and swoony.”

“Was not!”

“Okay, whatever. Just send the pictures to him and see how he responds. If he doesn’t text back, then I’ll drop it. But I’m guessing he will respond,” Billy commented.

“Big deal. He’ll be polite and tell me thanks and that it was nice to meet me,” James replied. “But then he’ll have the pictures to show his friends and laugh about how I’m the freak who used his poster as jack-off material. God, what if it gets to the press? Father will have a shit-fit.”

Maria reached across the table and stroked James’ hand. “James, you are letting your imagination run away from you. He seemed like a nice man. I’m sure he wouldn’t do that.”

“I’m not sending him the pictures,” James stated with determination.

“But…” Billy began to object.

“I’m not sending them,” James snapped. “And from now on, stay out of my business. I’m so pissed off at you right now. I mean it. You fucking embarrassed me, Billy. I can’t even look at you.”

Billy reacted like he’d been slapped, then looked down at the dinner plate before him. “I’m sorry, James.”

When Billy raised his head again, his eyes were moist. Nadia started massaging Billy’s arm. James knew Billy was sensitive and that he was his brother’s idol, so his infrequent reprimands always hurt him. But when he thought about how he could end up being the butt of Mike Cooper’s jokes when he was with his friends, it made him want to hide under the restaurant table and never reappear. He would normally tell Billy to forget about it, but this time, his brother had gone too far.

“You know, I’m beat. I’m heading home,” James announced. He pulled his credit card from his wallet and handed it to Billy. “Are you still coming over tomorrow for the mail I’ve been taking in for you while you were overseas?” Billy nodded, but seemed too afraid to speak. “You can return the card then.”

“James?” Billy’s voice cracked. “Please don’t go. I’m sorry.”

James nodded, but rose from the table and left the restaurant, choosing to walk home instead of taking a cab. He wanted time to clear his head. Billy, Nadia and Maria were right that he was attracted to Mike Cooper. He hoped it hadn’t been obvious to the athlete like the trio implied.

James thought Mike Cooper being into him was ludicrous—people didn’t just turn gay. James imagined that even if Cooper were attracted to men, he would never risk doing anything about it. The man had his reputation as a sports hero to protect. At best, James would be a dirty little secret—a quick encounter ending with Mike Cooper acting like he’d been seduced and leaving the scene in disgust.

James also had his father to consider. The last time Charles Vicksburg had discovered James was involved with a man, it hadn’t ended well. His father had warned him to break it off or he would be hurt. James kept seeing the man, figuring that even if his father went after him, it was worth it to be with his boyfriend each night. What he hadn’t anticipated was his father wounding James by destroying his lover. It had started when the suppliers to his boyfriend’s business started making excuses for why they couldn’t deliver. Soon after, more problems arose. James’ boyfriend’s employees were leaving for jobs where they were receiving large sign-on bonuses, his premises were failing health and safety standards over nonsensical observations and he was getting muscled by different organized crime families. The business didn’t survive, and neither did James’ relationship. James had vowed he would never again fall for someone and make them a target for his father.

Chapter Five

Two months passed since meeting James Vicksburg before Mike posted about his bisexuality on his social media accounts. Mike gave into temptation and read the responses even though people had warned him doing so could be upsetting. Although Mike saw a good number of nasty remarks, most comments were supportive. There were even several flirtatious invitations from men, offering to show him the ropes if his experience was lacking.

He wondered what James Vicksburg would be thinking if he read the news. He had never received the selfies from James that he requested, or for that matter, any text or call at all. It confirmed, in his mind, that James was a straight man who was uncomfortable with what he realized was attraction from Mike. Ghosting Mike was, no doubt, James’ polite way of discouraging thoughts Mike might have about the two of them together.

Mike had seen James on television a few weeks earlier where he was a guest on a talk show promoting his musical. It had been a coincidence that Mike caught the appearance, as he had been surfing channels just as the host had announced who her guest would be. Mike was entranced during the segment, still in awe of how beautiful James was. Even the host commented more than once that she would attend the show just to watch him dance in his short-shorts. Mike found himself agreeing that he would watch it again for that reason, too.

Watching the actor answer questions, Mike admired the man’s composure and humility. James had spoken well of the musical and the talent surrounding him, but had deflected when the host had shared the positive reviews of James’ own performance. When the host had asked if there was someone in his life, Mike had noticed that James had laughed with discomfort before answering that there was not. James had offered the typical celebrity’s excuse that he was too focused on his work to entertain a relationship. The host had never asked James if it would be a man or a woman that would interest James, which was understandable, but Mike wished she had. Despite the evidence of a sexual encounter James had had with his female co-worker, Mike hoped that, like himself, James might also be interested in men.

When the subject of James’ famous father had been raised, Mike noticed the light in James’ eyes had dimmed, though the smile had remained on his face. Mike knew the reaction well. It was the same empty grin he had displayed when answering reporters’ questions about his love life, a look pretending everything was great while hiding that something was wrong or missing. When the host had asked James whether he supported his father’s political positions and views, James had provided a neutral response that he sometimes agreed with his father and sometimes he did not—but that James was not a politician and he would leave it to the people to decide who they wanted to represent them in Congress.

Once the interview segment had ended and the network had cut to commercials, Mike had groaned when one of them was the stylized black and white cologne commercial that he had done. Mike had rolled his eyes as he had watched himself dive into a pool, emerging with water dripping from his bare chest. He had wondered if he was the only viewer who realized the actions had nothing to do with the fragrance that was being hawked. Mike had tried to remember that he had been paid a nice sum of money to shoot water scenes in a skin-tight, black Speedo. Mike now wondered whether the advertiser would continue airing the spot since he had proclaimed himself bisexual.

When the ads had ended and the talk show had resumed, James had been reintroduced so he could sing a number from the musical. It was one of the ballads that didn’t require dancing, and the cameras had panned up and down and in and out on James’ handsome face and build. Mike had found himself, once again, blown away by the man’s talent and beauty and wished James had sent the selfies, even if they never spoke again. Having a picture of himself standing next to James, each with their hands on each other’s backs, smiling in a happy moment, would have brought Mike joy.

Now Mike wondered if he would ever find a man that could enthrall him the way James had, and he thought maybe his agent had been right. If no man could live up to the standard James had set in Mike’s mind, Mike questioned whether there was a reason to have shared his sexual orientation with the public if he ended up with a woman anyway.