Page 27 of Trusting a Warrior

“A bitch of a no-win situation, isn’t it?”

“Ain’t that the truth.” Matt pinched the bridge of his nose tightly, voice growing even more hoarse. “Stop and save him, and have him hate me for it, or keep going and have to live with his death.”

“He’s going to be okay, though, yeah?”

“But for a few hours, I didn’t know that. All I knew was that he was hurt so fuckin’ bad.” Matt drew in a shaky breath. “And I didn’t stop...”

Geo stood by silently as Matt wrestled for control. At last he glanced up at him, his intense dark eyes glistening with unshed tears. “I’m sorry.”

“Oh, dude. Nothing to be sorry for.” His heart aching, Geo reached out to grip his shoulder. “The longer you’re in this business, the better you’ll learn how to compartmentalize this shit.”

Matt shook his head. “That’s what I’m afraid of. Compartmentalizing so much that I stop caring.” He smiled ruefully. “I’d rather feel the pain than have that happen. You know?”

Unbelievably Geo felt his own eyes start to burn, but with sheer force of will, he forced it back. “Well, there’s only so much pain you can allow yourself to feel before it eats you alive. Take it from me.”

They stared at each other for the space of a few heartbeats, and Geo could almost see the questions trembling on Matt’s lips. Before he could say anything, Bosch’s loud snort broke the spell, and in an instant, Geo retreated back into the safety of his macho armor.

“You’ll just have to figure it out for yourself, kid,” he said, giving an inward wince at the patronizing tone to his voice. “It sucks about your buddy, but don’t let yourself dwell on it too long.”

In the sudden awkwardness, Matt’s expression smoothed out, his own emotion now tightly locked down. “Yeah. Thanks for the advice, George,” he said evenly. “It was nice meeting you. Later, Bosch.”

With a lift of his hand, Matt turned and jogged away. Bosch gazed up at Geo almost reproachfully.

“Hey, what was I supposed to do?” Geo grunted. “Spew all over a guy I don’t even know, let alone trust?”

Besides, Matt’s pain was different than his own. What happened to Shane could be laid directly at the feet of a senseless, never-ending war. What’d happened to Cade...

Shame, guilt and helplessness flared back to life in the pit of Geo’s stomach. Matt wouldn’t understand anyway. How could he? A wet-behind-the-ears new guy with next to no combat experience didn’t get to judge Cade’s actions, or Geo’s. He had to goddamn earn that right.

Back in his room, Geo gave Bosch a bowl of water before dropping to sit cross-legged next to his crate. Bosch finished his drink and ambled over, then flopped on the rug and curled up to rest his head on Geo’s thigh.

Geo sifted his fingers through his fur, some of his tension easing. The soothing weight of the dog’s head on his leg, the warmth of his body, the comfort and companionship of this creature he loved and knew loved him back...

Right now it was just what he needed.

And all Lani wanted was a picture of him.

At the thought, Geo closed his eyes on a fresh wave of guilt. She’d been dealing with so much, and feeling so alone, and after they talked he’d ignored her simple request because he’d gotten sad over his dad’s death, something he hardly ever thought about anymore.

On impulse he pulled his phone from his pocket and rifled through his photo album. After finding the one he wanted, he scrolled to Lani’s name in his contacts and opened a text. I’m sorry about tonight, he typed, before attaching the pic and hitting Send.

No immediate answer. With a sigh, Geo pushed to his feet and headed for the shower, his silent phone tossed to the bed. When he emerged from the steamy bathroom, towel around his hips, his screen lit up, then faded to black as he eagerly reached for it.

Anticipation burning through him, he pulled up her reply.

Don’t be sorry. It was a weird night for both of us, I think. But thanks for the pic! I’d love to hear the story behind it sometime.

I’d love to tell you. His heart beating a bit faster, Geo typed, Can I take you to dinner the next time we’re in town? We should be home in a week or two.

It seemed forever until her answer came, although it was only a couple of seconds.

Sure. I’d like that.

An idiotic grin spreading over his face, Geo replied, It’s a date.

“Holy shit.”

Lani stared at the picture on her phone screen. In it, a shirtless Geo crouched next to a sleek black-and-tan dog, who sat looking stoically into the camera. Geo’s lips held a rueful twist, one hand braced on his thigh, the other held up to display his muscular forearm—a forearm crisscrossed with lurid stitches in the shape of a bite mark.