Page 42 of Paper Horses

“Tell Hudson I said hello.” The door shut behind her, yet still I didn’t move.

My brows furrowed, my instinctive walls rebuilding, the ice flowing back through my veins. I hated nice people, always throwing their kind words around thinking they knew you. Like Tori with her sweet smiles and elbow nudges. She aggravated me. Jessie aggravated me. Even more since I knew she’d had a relationship with Hudson.

The man you gave up.

I rubbed my temple and finished fixing my coffee. Stepping through the kitchen, I walked out the back door, where a deck spread out overlooking the side of the ranch. Putting my coffee down, I wandered back into the house, sifting through the pantry for anything healthy and only coming up with that damn box of cereal I was trying to avoid. Grabbing the blanket off the couch, I headed back to the porch and sat.

There was never a time in my life when my thoughts were quiet. When my father’s voice didn’t badger me into working more. Into being the perfect daughter he wanted me to be. The one who worked herself to the bone to be something she could never be: her brother. But here it was quiet enough to hear another voice. My own.

Quiet enough for regrets to creep through the cracks in my foundation. For what-ifs to rush forward.

The sound of the waves rushed to my ears with their descent on the surf, and I closed my eyes, letting it push away the ache in my chest. I heard the porch door open and close, followed by footsteps. Still, I kept my head tipped to the sky, my eyes closed as I hugged my knees. Gabe stayed quiet as he settled in the chair next to me. I didn’t have to question if it was him; I knew his movements as well as I knew mine. We were synched even if we didn’t show it. Distance forced by my father, but closeness created by his actions.

“Can we really pull this off?” I asked, breaking the silence as I opened my eyes, keeping them on the overcast sky.

“Yes.” A confident answer.

I glanced at him, finding his inquisitive hazel eyes on me. That was my brother, though. Quiet, thoughtful, almost too intelligent. The private school we’d attended had suggested he skip grades. Twice they approached my father about it, but each time he denied them, insisting Gabe needed to progress like the other children his age with no advantages. He never understood Gabe and that sharp mind. A boy who, by the time he graduated high school, had established layered LLCs and an investment portfolio that rivaled the most talented investors.

Underestimating Gabe, just like he always underestimated me.

I peeked over my shoulder.

“He’s not here. He left for a business trip at five.”

My brow quirked. “Do I need to ask why you know that?”

With a relaxed shrug, he said, “Couldn’t sleep. Saw him when I was making coffee.”

“Bet that was fun.”

“Awkward and demanding is more like it.” He scratched his ear, dragging his sight to the shore. “Barked at me about not screwing around when I get back to school. As if he doesn’t know I’m carrying a double major and still on track to graduate a year early.”

I studied my little brother, seeing the simmering resentment there and the burden of carrying the Icinda legacy on his shoulders.

“But we can do this, right?”

His eyes shot back to mine. “Why are you suddenly doubting the plan?”

I swallowed, tucking the ache away that had been hounding me for years and only worsening the closer I came to graduation. “I have two months until graduation. Two months before I take my place in the company with Dad.” My sight dropped to my skirt, fixating on a loose string. “I promised nothing would come between us seeing this plan through. That no distractions would derail us. We both knew what that meant.”

“Yeah, and there haven’t been any for me. This comes first.” He leaned forward, folding his hands.

“None?” I asked, grasping at straws even though there were none to find.

“None. And there won’t be. There’s too much at stake for me to let anybody in.” His fingers spread through his hair. “Besides, I’m too busy studying, and the girls at school aren’t worth the risk.”

“We’re over ten years from seeing this to fruition, Gabe. There might be someone.”

He shook his head adamantly. “No, there won’t.” His eyes narrowed. “Are you backing out? Is that what this is?”

“I…” I wanted to. I would lose my trust fund, my position at my father’s company, but even worse, I would confirm every one of my father’s assumptions and biases. Feed into his narrative that I wasn’t worth as much as Gabe because I was female. For Hudson, I would have faced it. Lived my life with him on a farm, far from the city and this life. But this wasn’t about what I wanted. It was about Gabe and my mother. I had promised Gabe that I would see this through, avenge our mother and pay our father back for all he had done. I was doing this for all the times I hadn’t been able to step up for him.

“No, I’m not. I’m saying goodbye to Hudson when I graduate, just like I said I would.”

“Liv, you don’t⁠—”

“I do. No distractions means no relationships to trip us up. I need to be COO, have Father’s trust, and be in place when you take yours. Then we’ll dismantle him piece by piece until our inheritance kicks in, and we watch him crumble, knowing we stole his life’s work from him like he stole our mother.”