Page 40 of Paper Horses

“Did they come with the farm?”

“Well, no. I had to sell the ones the ranch hands used when I was liquidating.” He scratched his head, a shadow crossing his eyes. “Trying to find enough money to save it.”

“And those two?”

He gave me a shrug. “I got Honey right after you left. Bought her as a foal back home. Ivy came from a ranch a few towns over from here. They were going to put her down. She was too unruly, and they deemed her untrainable.”

“Yet there she is. Doesn’t look like trouble to me.”

He glanced over at the horses. “Yeah, she’s a good horse. Not sure why I didn’t sell her with the others. Knew I wouldn’t sell Honey. She’s what spurred me to come out here. To leave the company.”

“Your mom?” I asked, curious about what had happened. She was nothing like Hudson. Where he was a dreamer, she lived for her business. Driven and successful. Intimidating the few times I’d met her. Now, I doubted I’d think the same given what I had turned into, but back then, she’d made me uncomfortable.

“Yeah.” His eyes took on a faraway look. “Pissed her off something fierce. She gave me enough to get me started. I think she thought I’d fail right away and come crawling back home.”

There was something more he kept to himself, his eyes taking on a faraway look. I wasn’t so sure I had the right to ask, given our situation.

“But you didn’t.” It wasn’t a question. It was a pronounced statement because this was Hudson. Not stuffed in a suit, sitting behind a desk, closed in by walls.

“Nah. Not the life for me. I considered it for a minute when I put the ranch up for sale. Your brother’s offer to keep me on and let me stay here is the only reason I didn’t.”

And my anger at Gabe for sending me here diminished significantly.

“Guess you need to go through numbers to see if this will work?” he asked with an abrupt change of subject.

“Budget is Tori’s thing, but I’ll need to know what’s needed to make it work. Then I can send her my findings and see what she says. Gabe’s notes suggest he’s not concerned with spending on the project.” Which was very unlike my brother.

“Then let’s go spend his money.”

“It’s my money, too,” I said, catching up with him as he walked away.

“That makes it even better.”

Sharp stones dug into my feet, and I hopped back onto the grass. My boots were still dangling in Hudson’s hands, and I considered the ball of socks in my hand, not particularly keen on asking him to carry me back.

He stopped and looked back at me, a devious grin forming when he realized I couldn’t walk over the stone driveway. Holding the boots up, his brow lifting, he said, “Looks like you need me.”

The words hung between us, driving like a knife into my chest because I really did need him. I always had, and only now did I see how badly.

“Maybe,” I answered.

“Tell you what.” He folded his arms, tucking the boots under one. “Tell me why you started that fight and I’ll come to you.”

I drew in a sharp inhale that was like glass scratching its way into my throat. “What does it matter? It’s been over fifteen years.”

“Because the longer I’ve thought on it, the more it pisses me off.”

My lips thinned. “I’m not going back to that day. Now hand me the boots.”

“Not until you tell me why.”

But I couldn’t. There was too much, and going back to that day would wreck me again, sending the pieces I’d stitched together unraveling until my foundation faltered. Sending tears I’d locked away since I was a child tumbling free, and I wasn’t certain they would ever stop. Decades of bottling up my tears was bound to leave its mark.

“No.” I took a step onto the gravel, wincing as it dug into my foot. Then another, biting my lip. I was adept at suffering emotional and verbal agony, but not physical. That was Gabe’s burden, the one he had borne for me.

I stopped and rolled my lip under my teeth, biting into it to dull the sting of the stones.

“Goddamn stubborn woman.” In two strides, Hudson swooped me into his arms. He trudged back to the house, dumping me on the bottom step of the porch before he stalked past me and slammed the front door open. I heard the boots drop before he stormed past me again