Page 88 of Kylie

I didn’t want to give them time.

They’d had too much as it was. Almost two years I’d been gone. If they had been searching for me in the beginning, there was a good chance I wouldn’t have been stuck in that hell for so long. I wouldn’t have missed seeing my kids, watching them grow up…

My chest grew tighter with every passing second.

Taking a deep breath, I stared back at Travis and Gage, willing my heart rate to slow.

I wasn’t being fair to them. I knew I wasn’t. They weren’t responsible for any of this. Not a single moment of it.

But it was so easy to cast blame on them. To make it their fault that I had suffered for so long. That I had missed so much. My babies weren’t babies anymore, and I couldn’t deny that looking at them made my heart ache. Not to mention the way they looked at me. I was a stranger, an unknown woman now living in their house, replacing the woman they’d once called mom. I could sense their trepidation, knew they were wondering how long I would be there, what I wanted from them. It made me feel like a fraud, like I was responsible for abandoning them.

I wasn’t. Or was I?

Travis’s phone rang, pulling me from my thoughts. He grabbed it from his desk and looked at the screen.

“It’s Pop,” he said. “Let me talk to him for a minute.”

I stared at him, waiting. I wasn’t finished with this conversation. Not by a long shot. They were not going to shut me out of this.

“Hey, Pop, what’s up?” Travis greeted, turning away from me and walking toward the window that overlooked the front yard. “Yeah. They’re up and about.”

There was a lengthy pause, followed by, “That’d be great. We’ll see y’all in a few.”

I ground my teeth together, frustrated that he was inviting his parents over. And I knew that was what he was doing. It used to be his way of shutting down a conversation he didn’t want to have. Whether it was with Gage or me, Travis knew just the right thing to⁠—

“Mom and Pop are gonna pick up the kids, take them to lunch so we can have a couple of hours alone.”

I stared at him, gearing up for a tirade to rival all. He was not going to shut me down. Not in this. I wanted⁠—

“While they do that, I thought we’d show you somethin’,” Travis said, looking directly at me.

I stared at him, then at Gage and back. “Show me what?”

“Do you trust us?”

Did I? That was a damn good question. Yesterday I would’ve said yes. Right now … at this very moment … I wasn’t sure who or what I trusted. I was angry. No, I was furious. I couldn’t fathom that life had gone on without me. It just didn’t make sense. It was bad enough that I was weak and constantly in pain after the ordeal, but now I had to endure those blank stares from my kids. They wanted answers, I could tell. But they didn’t even know the questions to ask because I was supposed to be in their past. They’d dealt with the grief; they’d put it behind them.

They’d moved on.

I’d only been here for a few hours, and it was glaringly obvious how little of me remained in this house. There were pictures, sure. In the kids’ bedrooms, I’d noticed there were many pictures. Some of me by myself, some of me with them. A daily reminder of their mother, and yet they still didn’t recognize me.

But they had tried. Travis and Gage had attempted to keep my memory alive, so it wasn’t fair for me to lay the blame at their feet. It was not their fault. None of this was.

“Yes,” I answered, unballing my fists and exhaling heavily. “Of course I trust you.”

Travis stepped closer, holding out his hand the way he had a few minutes ago. I didn’t hesitate, giving him mine. He pulled me in, and I went willingly, letting him wrap me in his arms. He smelled good. The same as before. Like Travis. Clean, with a hint of fresh musk. I breathed him in like an addict attempting to get their fix. It helped. Some.

“A lot has changed,” I mumbled into his shirt.

“I know, baby.” His big palm ran up and down my back. “But we’d like to fill in some of the gaps for you.”

With my head on his chest, I nodded. I liked that idea. Perhaps if I could see some of the things I’d missed, I would understand. Or at the very least, I would have a better understanding. Because for the life of me, I couldn’t wrap my head around them moving on without me.

Gage

I was at a loss for words.

Between Kylie’s anger and Travis’s about-face, I felt like I was in an alternate reality. Since when had Travis become the rational one?