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As though she just realized what time it was, Kylie frowned. “What’re you doin’ home so early?”

“I wanted to check on you.”

She stared and I could see the concern in her pretty blue eyes. “Because I freaked out last night?”

I considered lying to her, but figured it wasn’t a good use of anyone’s time. “Yes. And because I’ve been thinkin’ about you all day.”

We stood there like that, staring at one another. I wanted to ask her to tell me what happened, to share that horror so I could carry some of her burden, but I refrained. Kylie wasn’t the only person seeing a shrink. I’d had standing appointments with Dr. Briggs since shortly after we buried what I thought was my wife in that casket. Back then, Dr. Briggs and I discussed coping with the loss and ways I could stop alienating my family. These days, we discussed coping with her return and finding ways to make her feel safe when it was clear she didn’t.

I would continue to have those conversations, but until Kylie told us what happened, until she shared that part of her life, I couldn’t completely understand what she went through. Oh, I had some idea. I had eyes, after all. But she was healing on a physical level. What I wanted was to help her emotionally. And right now, the only way I knew to do that was to show her that we were here without overwhelming her.

In order to do that successfully, I had to give my wife space. And that was becoming more difficult with every passing day since the only thing I wanted to do was hold her, to touch her, to kiss her, to connect with her on that level only the three of us had ever shared.

Unfortunately, we didn’t appear to be making much progress in getting closer.

Not yet.

But we would.

I had faith after all.

Chapter Forty-Eight

Wednesday, November 9, 2022

Kylie

“Let me out! Martin, you bastard! Let me out!”

“Kylie, baby. Wake up.”

I was aware of gentle hands touching me, dragging me from the depths of hell. It took eons to breach the surface, but I finally came out of the nightmare, gasping for air and desperate to be free of the blankets trapping me.

Opening my eyes, I noticed Gage was standing beside the bed, shifting the blankets away, giving me freedom. Travis was sitting on the other side, giving me space.

But I didn’t want space. I wanted them. Here. I wanted the safety they represented.

As I kicked my legs free of the blankets and shoved them to the foot of the bed, I held out a trembling hand to each of them. I could sense their hesitation, so I added, “Come back. Please.”

The mattress shifted as they joined me. As soon as I could touch them, I pulled them toward me, although pulling was relative since neither one of them would’ve budged if they didn’t want to. My goal was to ensure they knew I didn’t want the space they continued to give me. I was tired of the distance. It had gone on long enough. It was time for us to move forward. And they were waiting on me.

“You’re safe,” Travis whispered, spooning behind me, sliding his arm under the pillow, leaving room for Gage.

Gage rolled to his back and scooted closer, allowing me to rest my head on his chest.

And then there we were, the three of us as we used to be. Together. Safe.

The only sound in the room was my still rapid breaths, but they eventually slowed as Gage’s steady heartbeat near my ear settled me.

“You wanna talk about it?” Gage prompted after a few minutes of silence.

My immediate reaction was no, I didn’t want to talk about the nightmare that continued to plague me. Fortunately, I was usually able to wake myself up before I terrified them. Evidently, I wasn’t as good at it as I thought.

Rather than answer, I countered with, “Do you wanna hear it?”

That seemed to surprise them because I felt the tension in their bodies.

“Yes,” Travis said softly, his breath fanning the back of my neck. “Talk to us, baby.”