Page 29 of Only One Tour Bus

Alibi of reading firmly in hand, quite literally, I look to my heart’s content. Asha is animated, talking to someone on her phone. She radiates happiness, laughing with whoever as she speaks what must pass for conversational French in the American school system.

But what she lacks in accent, she makes up for in enthusiasm. And I do mean she lacks in accent. She just asked if they served poison instead of fish. Granted, it’s an easy mistake since those words are so close, a real joke on whoever is trying to learn French and order fish.

I slide back over and take the phone gently from her hand. Not gently enough, because she looks at me like I stole one of her absurd backpacks.

I cover the receiver. “Tell me what you want to say and I’ll ask.” To the person on the line, I say I’ll be taking over translating, in French. He breathes a sigh of relief, while also sounding disappointed not to be speaking to the Wee Sunshine again.

I know the feeling, mate. I hate it, but I can’t deny knowing it.

CHAPTER 13

ASHA

The group is already rowdy and more than a little stir-crazy when we park in front of the hotel in London, right next to the Tower of London. It takes more patience than usual to get everyone checked in and to their rooms, and I start with the sober people. I make sure they have recommendations for dinner, drinks, and free time options, and Callum shows them his lists, and then we bid them good night.

Everyone else wants to go drinking.

Callum gets a stubborn look on his face, and I know he’s going to throw keys at them and let them find their own way, so I grab the packet of keys before he can. Instead, I start negotiating with the drunk emotional terrorists.

I promise them if they can get their bags locked safely in their rooms, I’ll take them to a pub I know around the corner, which is the best pub in London. They somehow believe me, despite us not staying remotely near the heart of London nightlife.

“You’re agreeing to take them out?” Callum asks, incredulous.

“If I can get them to their rooms, half will take one look at that bed and not come out again. They’ll order room service and be nice and rested for the walking tour tomorrow. And the rest, I should probably take them somewhere they’re least likely to get in trouble. Here.”

“That’s a good idea.” He sounds impressed. Rude.

“Hey, I know things. I especially know things about the eighteen-to-thirty tour. My bread-and-butter.”

“I haven’t had to deal with drunken twenty-somethings in a long time. I don’t relish doing it again.”

“I’ll have you know, I haven’t lost someone since the tour we don’t speak of.”

“But—”

“If I was going to speak about that tour, I would point out that I can’t actually kidnap adults and make them make good choices. I did what I could by blatantly lying to them to steer them to the most boring bars and about what time it was. I was just as surprised as anyone when the cops knocked on my door.”

“What—”

“But I’m not going to talk about it.” I wait a beat. “If I was going to say more about it, I would add that I got all the charges dropped, and no one spent more than a few hours in jail.”

“Oh, grand.”

“But don’t worry, that was when I was a baby tour leader. No cops since then.” I pat Callum on the arm, not as an excuse to feel his muscles, although it is quite the perk. I can’t help it that friendly motions can be construed as sexual if one party is about to melt into a pile of lust.

Me. I’m about to melt into a pile of lust. Which is why my fingers linger. I snatch my arm back when I notice the lingering and turn to take my own bags to my room.

“That’s not comforting,” Callum yells after me.

I wave at him. “Be in the lobby in fifteen minutes if you want to see how many people take me up on the offer.”

Jennifer stops me before I reach the stairs. “I need some laundry done.”

Already? We’ve only been through one city. This may be a record. “I can look up some laundromats or dry cleaners for you. The hotel probably does something as well, although I don’t know what they would charge for that.” I get my phone out.

“I don’t want to deal with figuring out all that, I’m on vacation! Could you just coordinate it?”

“Your laundry?”