Page 38 of A Holiday By Gaslight

He looked around. “Have you read all of these books?”

She laughed. “Hardly. I can’t even claim to have read half of them. They’re mostly treatises on agriculture and natural philosophy.”

“Not topics very much to your liking, then.”

“Not entirely, no. Though I’ve recently purchased a new book which might qualify as both.” She moved to the high wooden shelves on the opposite wall and extracted a volume bound in green cloth. “It’s rather controversial,” she said as she extended it to him.

Ned took it, his eyes sweeping over the gilt lettering on the spine. “Charles Darwin?”

“Papa doesn’t know I purchased it. He wouldn’t approve.”

“I’m not sure I approve.” Ned flipped through the pages.

She moved to take it back from him. “Are you the sort of gentleman who’d restrict a lady’s reading?”

He held it out of her reach. “Don’t be hasty. That isn’t what I meant. I simply don’t know if I agree with the man’s theories.”

“And why not? You of all people should see the wisdom in his hypothesis. He believes that living creatures adapt and change in unique and interesting ways. That this very adaptation is what ensures their survival.”

“He also believes that human beings derived from monkeys. Or, possibly, worms.”

She gave him a look of mild reproof. “You’ve been reading Punch.”

“I’ve seen the caricatures. They’re not very flattering to Darwin’s theories.”

“Punch isn’t flattering to anyone. I wouldn’t put much stock in their opinions. Mr. Darwin’s theories on natural selection have been endorsed by countless men of science. And they seem perfectly reasonable to me. What I can understand of them.”

He returned her book. His blue eyes grew serious. “Is that really what you think I’ve done? Adapted and changed to ensure my survival like some plant or animal on an island somewhere?”

“Not exactly. Plants and animals have little in the way of free will. But the idea is the same, isn’t it? Adaptation and survival? Only for human beings there’s an element of choice involved.”

“I’ve never considered it.”

“I have. Indeed, it seems a particularly important point in our modern world. Every day there’s a new idea, a new invention. We can no longer be content to stay in the same place, doing the same things as generations before us. We must alter our behavior. We must adapt ourselves to the times or risk being left behind.”

Ned looked at her for a long moment. And then, very slowly, an expression of understanding came over his face. But not just understanding, she realized. There was something else there as well. A brief glimmer of compassion. Of tenderness. “You’re seeking to rationalize your father’s obsession with modernization.”

“No! It’s not that.” She wandered behind one of the leather chairs near the fireplace, her hand resting briefly on the tufted back. “At least, it’s not only that.”

Ned regarded her from beneath lowered brows as she walked back to the bookcase. “I thought we agreed you were going to leave that particular burden with me.”

“It’s not so easy to relinquish it. Not when I’ve been carrying it for as long as I can remember.”

“Sophie…” He followed after her, slow and cautious. As if he were stalking one of the wild does in the woods outside Appersett House. “I’ve been meaning to ask you…”

She turned to re-shelve Mr. Darwin’s book. “Yes?”

“The morning we walked together, you said you hadn’t wished to marry when you were nineteen, nor when you were twenty, nor one-and-twenty. That it hadn’t mattered to you when your father took your dowry.” He came to stand behind her. “Why didn’t you wish to marry?”

She stilled for an instant, her fingers frozen on the spine of the book. And then she turned back to look at him. “I suspect you already know the answer.”

“You’re needed here.”

“I’m needed here.”

Ned’s face was grim. “You help to manage things for your family. To keep them from ruin.”

“It isn’t so heroic as all that. My mother and I haven’t that much power. All we can do is make little economies. Carve up the household budget to trim away any fat. Dye our gowns, remake our old hats, that sort of thing. As for the rest…it all comes down to our powers of persuasion. We’ve been trying to convince Papa to sell his hunters. To retrench. But he’s disinclined to make any sacrifices at present.”