Page 40 of Septembers

He watched as they bickered, feeling his muscles relax. His dad left them before Theo could form memories, so he never knew what it was like to live with both parents. But having his aunt live with them felt like something better. Any time his mom got tipsy, she would tell him how broken she’d been after the divorce, how incapable she was of taking care of him, how Liana saved them both just by being there.

Sure, it meant he was raised in the back room of a bar and his mom was often so exhausted after her nursing shifts that Theo was the one tucking her into bed, but he grew up loved, and he knew not everyone was so lucky.

When Theo decided to go to university, they’d discussed Liana moving out, but it didn’t feel right. She had her own space in the apartment to live her life. And plus, his mom still needed her. In a way, she was still a bit broken.

Liana jangled her car keys. “Are we doing this?”

He nodded, and she dodged past his mom out the door.

“Buy the organic kind! Don’t burn my son’s scalp with your nonsense!” His mom walked back to him, half annoyed, half amused, then ran her hands through his hair. “Let me appreciate it one last time.”

It took twenty minutes for his aunt to return with four different boxes of dye. She told her sister to wait so they could have a big reveal, then made Theo change into an old t-shirt.

“You okay?” She wiped the dye off his forehead with a damp towel, leaning over him as he sat on the edge of the bathtub. It was an ancient, iron, claw-footed monstrosity that they’d been talking about replacing since Theo was toddler.

“Yeah, it tingles, but not in a bad way.” Even with the window open, the smell of the bleach was overpowering, like he was trapped in a room with fifty indoor pools. It was the furthest thing from organic, but, like so many of his activities with his aunt through the years, he promised not to tell his mom.

“Theo.” She put the towel down and leaned against the sink. “What’s different?”

He couldn’t play dumb. Past experience had taught him that when Aunt Liana’s gut felt something was off, there was no escaping her scarily perceptive attention.

“It’s not a huge deal.” His shrug felt forced even to him. “Dae and I had a weird week, that’s all.”

“Weird how?”

He sighed and leaned back, forgetting there wasn’t a back to his ‘seat’ and having to throw his legs out to rebalance himself. His aunt just watched him like an anthropologist collecting data.

“He and Jacinda are having some issues, but it’s fine because I fixed it.”

She shook her head at the ceiling as if asking for strength. “Of course you did.” When she brought her stare back to him, there was something sad underneath the frustration. “At any point did it occur to you to just…not?”

“Not what? Help?” The chemicals were starting to get to him, fuzzing his brain.

“What was the issue?”

“He needs to choose her more.”

“Choose her over what?” When he didn’t respond, she nodded in that fake ‘a-ha’ way people did when they already knew the answer to the question they were asking. “Over you.”

“Not necessarily.” Yes. Over him. He hadn’t wanted to admit it during his talks with either of them, but wasn’t that what it came down to? Dae didn’t have many commitments outside of school, and Jason and Caleb didn’t need him the way Theo did. They weren’t the ones demanding his time, pretending it was for his sake, when really…

“I just need to give them some space.”

She digested this, her eyes burrowing into his. “Dae told you this? That he needs space?”

“He agreed that he should focus on his girlfriend.”

“Who was he agreeing with?”

“Okay, fine. Me.”

“Hmmmm.” Her face hardened, her body leaning towards him so he wouldn’t miss a single sarcastic syllable. “So what does that entail? A set number of words you can say to him each day? Carry around a yard stick to make sure you’re never within a few feet? Reserve the kitchen in advance?”

“You’re making it sound ridiculous.”

“It is ridiculous, kid.” She sat down beside him on the bathtub, wincing as she did. “Ah, it’s cold.” Then she took a deep breath and his body followed, the chemical-filled air prickling his throat and lungs. “Listen to me: People have partners and best friends simultaneously. That’s a thing that happens. Quite frequently.”

Outside, a streetcar rattled by, and he turned to the window as if it were the most interesting sound in the world. “Jacinda deserves his full attention.”