Page 42 of If I Didn’t Have You

“Because it makes her feel good!” he practically shouted.

For just a second, it felt like the whole gym went quiet. In actuality, it was like his words echoed around me, landing poignantly in the center of my chest, knocking the air from my lungs.

This was what she wanted? This made her feel good? I didn’t understand it. She was in a ring, throwing her fists around. How the hell did that give her something I couldn’t?

But as my gaze settled on her again, I had to admit that she wasn’t half bad. Clearly, someone had been training her, and that someone was Blake, if my eyes weren’t playing games with me.

I just didn’t understand it. What inspired all these women to gather in town at the gym and do this…stuff? Surely, they had better things to do with their time.

Like be near me.

That was the real problem, though I didn’t care to admit it. Clara had moved on from our life together, and was finding other things to do that didn’t include me. She was no longer at my beck and call. She wasn’t waiting for me at lunchtime or fussing over me the moment I walked through the door.

She was taking care of herself now, and as much as I hated to admit it, it was good for her.

I turned on my heel, not wanting to intrude on her time away. If that was what she needed, then I’d give it to her, even if it did make me feel like I was missing half my heart.

“Pop, where are you going?”

“Home.”

“But—”

“Your mother is busy, and I have work to do,” I grumbled, not wanting to admit to my son that I was not wanted here.

If I was, my wife would have told me where she was going. She would have shared this new hobby with me. But instead, she kept it to herself, and that said more about the state of our relationship than I cared to admit.

It was good for her, that much was clear.

Now, I just had to figure out how my life functioned without my wife catering to my every whim. Without her by my side at all times.

She was pulling away, and soon, I would be nothing more than another trinket on the shelf.

13

CLARA

When the class let out, I walked over to the bench and grabbed a towel, swiping it down my face. I was sweating hard, and nothing had ever felt as good. The first few days were rough, but once the first week passed, I found my rhythm and got pleasure out of the burn in my muscles. I never knew something could be so exciting, so fulfilling.

Most of the other ladies agreed that this was something they’d needed, but there were a few who decided it wasn’t for them and left. And that was fine. I was doing this for me, not for a way to connect with the other wives in town.

It also gave Blake the opportunity to have a more structured schedule, which she said helped her get back in fighting shape. I wasn’t sure if she planned to go back out on the road and find bad guys to beat up or not, but she was beaming every day when she left the gym.

Sam’s manager, on the other hand, did not look as pleased with the fact that we spent our mornings here. I had to find a way to make it up to this man. The last thing I wanted was for Deke to take his anger out on Sam for helping us.

Smiling, I walked over to the grumpy man and held out my hand. “I don’t think we’ve been introduced. I’m Clara, Blake’s mother-in-law.”

“Deke,” he grunted out.

“Look, I’m really sorry we’ve been taking up so much space in the gym, but we really appreciate it.”

The man crossed his arms over his chest, glaring at me. “You do realize Sam is a professional boxer, and this gym was set up for him to practice.”

“I do. And like I said, we’re all extremely grateful⁠—”

“Don’t care. You can do your exercises anywhere. Sam is here to do his job.”

Wow, I could see this man was not going to be won over easily. “You know, I’m making a big roast for dinner tonight. Perhaps you’d like to come by and eat with us. Sam will be there, and we’d love to have you.”