Page 1 of When It’s All Said And Done

Chapter 1

Vanessa “Nessa” Evans

My mind raced a mile a minute as I laid next to my boyfriend of four years, Nasir. The sex we’d just had temporary distracted my mind from the dark cloud over us. Tomorrow was Doom’s Day in my book because it was Nas’ sentencing date. Back when I was fifteen planning our future, I never pictured a prison stay as part of it. With the unknown being unknown I was on pins and needles until tomorrow, and so was he.

“Nessa,” Nas called out.

“Yes?” I turned to face him.

“I can’t thank you enough for takin’ out a loan for my bond. I don’t know what I would’ve done had I had to stay in jail until my trial. I promise I’ll pay you back with interest.”

“Nas, stop that. I did it because I love you and I’d do it again in a heartbeat. You don’t have to pay me back because if the roles were reverse, I know you’d do the same. Plus, you’ll pay me back by buyin’ me a two-story house with a massive master bathroom and a big ass backyard.”

“It may be a while before I can do that, but I promise I gotcha.”

“It’s ok. However long it takes will be worth the wait. We’re goin’ to stay positive about tomorrow, ok? And no matter what the judge says I’m going to be there for you every step of the way.”

“Ok.”

He pulled me on top of him as he wrapped his strong arms around me. Tears slowly slid down my face as I thought of this being the last time he’s able to hold me. Nas was not only my first boyfriend but my first everything. I didn’t know how I was going to handle him being away, but I was going to be strong for him. There was no need for me to hound him for the decision he made three months ago that landed us here. He was already beating himself up enough and the only thing I wanted to give him was peace. I said a quick prayer before I closed my eyes to try and get some rest.

The next day, my leg bounced uncontrollably as I sat behind Nas in the courtroom. I had a death grip on his grandma’s, Evangeline who everyone calls Mama Eva, hand as my stomach flipped around. When the judge ordered Nas to stand up for his sentencing time seemed to move in slow motion. Nas was about to be sentenced for an attempted armed robbery charge, and with this being his first time in trouble I was hoping for probation or even just a year away. My hope quickly evaporated soon as the judge opened his mouth.

“You are hereby sentenced to five years in the Florida Department of Corrections. Bailiff, escort Mr. Wilson to the back to be processed. He’ll be shipped off in four days’ time.”

The wind felt as if it were knocked out of me as I did my best to stand. Mama Eva helped me to my feet as the tears came down at rapid speed. As the bailiff made it to Nas, he turned to face me. His face was a mix of emotions, I could see the hurt, anger, defeat, and sadness clear as day. We mouthed ‘I love you’ to each other before he shook his head. My eyes stayed on him as they walked towards the back. When he looked at me again his face was stone cold and free of any emotions that I’d just seen which worried me.

“Jesus, be with my baby,” Mama Eva prayed as we left the courtroom. “Nessa, how are you holdin’ up?”

“I think I’m goin’ to be sick,” I answered as I searched frantically for a bathroom.

Running into the women’s bathroom, I entered an empty stall just as I threw up what little breakfast I’d eaten. Wiping my mouth with some tissue, I dropped it in the toilet before flushing it. After I washed my hands, I made my way out to find Mama Eva. When we made it to her 2007 Toyota Camry, I got into the driver’s seat. Before we pulled off, I had another break downbecause what was I going to do without Nas for five years. Mama Eva didn’t speak any words but rubbed my back until I was ready to go.

When we pulled onto her block in Liberty City, the whole strip was hot. Kids ran through the street while women strutted up and down the sidewalk in little shorts. With the hope of catching the eye of one of the dudes shooting dice or making plays while music blasted from parked cars. All of this was a typical day during the summer in Miami. I pulled into Mama Eva’s driveway before helping her out of the car.

“You gonna spend the night with me again?” Mama Eva inquired as she sat in her recliner next to the AC window unit in the living room.

“Yes ma’am. That way I can use your car and go see Nas in the mornin’ before my shift,” I answered as I covered her with a blanket. “But first I’m goin’ to go check on my mama.”

“Ok sweetie. Well, take my keys with you and lock the front door.”

“Yes ma’am.”

After securing the front door, I headed down the sidewalk towards my house. We lived a few blocks over in Pork and Beans projects. As I made my way home, I spoke to some of the kids and ignored the dog calls coming from some of the niggas. My heart belonged to one guy, and everybody in the neighborhood knew that. When I made it to the front door, my heart dropped when my eyes landed on the eviction notice. Snatching the paper off the door, I entered the small two-bedroom apartment I shared with my mom. Daphne.

“Ma! You home?!” I yelled out as I surveyed the empty liquor bottles all over the living floor.

“Yeah, baby. I’m in my room,” she called out.

Stepping over the bottles, I made my way towards her room to get some answers. I’d just given her majority of my check. Plus, it was going to be impossible for me to pick up more shifts at Family Dollar because I’d just paid for me to start my CNA classes at night. This eviction was the last thing I needed to be stressed about with everything else on my plate. When I stepped in the doorway of her room, I was disappointed by the sight before me. She laid spiraled cross her mattress naked with a bottle in her hand.

Ma, get up! I came home and there was an eviction notice on the door,” I explained as I shook my head. “I been giving you money to go towards the bills but clearly you haven’t been payin’ them.”

“Girl, don’t come in here fuckin’ lecturin’ me! I’m the mother in this bitch!” She snapped as she tried to sit up.

“Then fuckin’ act like it because we ‘bout to be out on the damn streets!”

“Ain’t no we. Yo’ ass hardly be here. You be over there with Nas and his grandma. So, just gone back over there I’ll figure my shit out. Hell, I think I can go stay with one of my friends.”