Page 103 of Darkest Obsession

Sylvia’s at her nurse’s appointment for another fifteen minutes to get approval for attending the party so Kola and I get our first preview of our “sexy three blind mice” costume. We picked it out of a jar when we couldn’t agree on a costume for three best friends. Sylvia really wanted to be Scooby-Doo but we both thought it would be weird as hell if she really sat there dressed up like a dog while Kola and I dressed as humans. So now we’re going as sexy mice. My mom would love the costume. I’m wearing black pantyhose under mine so I don’t have to dress too revealing. I agreed to do the sexy thing for my friends, but I’d still be more comfortable in a tall t-shirt and sweatpants.

My mom treats Halloween like Christmas, so I’ve gone out of my way to ignore her calls so she doesn’t try to dress me up in a thong or send her a pic for the family social media account. Kola rifles through the box for the accessories.

“Where the hell are the tails?!” She shrieks.

They’re already on the bed. I hold them up triumphantly and search for my leotard. Kola wears the large size because of her boobs and height, Sylvia and I are both mediums, although when I hold the medium leotard up, I suddenly feel self conscious. Is my whole ass supposed to fit in this? I don’t want to look like a hoe. I hope my tights are enough to cover my butt up.

Kola pulls out the sunglasses and puts on a pair.

“How do I look? Thomas said he thought the costume idea was sexy.”

My cheeks grow instantly warm. I try to act all casual about them talking. In fake dating, they have what seems like a real friendship. I don’t care or anything, but it’s weird to hear about Kola and Thomas hanging out alone. In public. Holding hands.

“He said that?”

Maybe he’s finally moved on from me. Kola has a way better body and she’s never hit him in the torso with a cricket bat. He doesn’t want to date a bitch like me.

“Uh huh,” Kola says. “Our fake relationship is getting pretty serious.”

“Great.”

Ugh. I sound jealous and fake, which definitely isn’t what I’m going for. She’s my best friend and this is all a part of our plan. I shouldn’t sound all surprised and messed up over it. I glance at the sunflowers. They’re still alive. Barely. I need to chill. I had my chance with Thomas Bainbridge. He spilled his heart out to me and I told him to fuck off.

He doesn’t want to deal with a fuck up like me.

Kola takes the sunglasses off and starts stripping to dress in the costume. Hell, I’d better start changing too. As we’re changing, I can’t help but notice how good she looks from dancing. I’m all pudgy in the wrong places but Kola has curves made for social media. Thomas probably likes her curves. He squeezed my hips like he was holding on for dear life and Kola has hips most women would kill for. Plus, she’s sweet. I’m not. She has a flat stomach and mine sticks out with weird ass pooch. This is the worst feeling to have before squeezing myself into a leotard. I hate that I feel like shit.

I unbutton the leotard and climb in after dressing in my leggings, slowly working the buttons up the front of my body, feeling worse and worse as I struggle to get myself inside. Kola gets into hers, but her leotard still pushes her boobs together so they’re practically spilling out.

“Is this too slutty?”

I shake my head. She looks damn good. Any guy who saw her tonight would be crazy not to try to go for her. She throws on the sunglasses and grabs her cane out of the box. “How do I look?”

Before I can tell her that she looks fucking amazing, Sylvia bursts into my bedroom.

“I’m still slightly concussed and finally approved to partayyyyy!” Sylvia says, turning up her typical cheer. We all dance around excitedly. This is our first party in ages and school has been kicking all our asses. Spicy freak hasn’t stopped sending creepy messages, but no more threats. Nothing. It feels like we can actually let go tonight for a change and that for once, our plan will work.

Once we all dress, Sylvia demands ‘intelligence’ on Kola and Thomas’ fake relationship.

“We’ve had breakfast together every day this week,” Kola says. “And he kissed me outside of math. He is such a good kisser.”

I feel like someone punched me in the side of my head. They kissed? I didn’t know kissing was part of the plan. I didn’t know fake relationships included kissing. But of course they did.

“Ew!” Sylvia says. “Don’t tell me about kissing Thomas.”

“He’s the first white guy I ever kissed,” Kola continues excitedly. “I thought he would be a No-Lips-Norbert but he’s got LIPS.”

“What the hell is a no-lips-Norbert?!” Sylvia squeals, getting into her costume and twirling her cane.

“It’s a figure of speech,” Kola says. “I don’t know girl… maybe after this, we could be for real. If Clover doesn’t mind.”

Kola and Sylvia turn to look at me.

“Why the hell would I mind? I don’t have feelings for Thomas.” I don’t even sound convincing. I put on my blind mouse sunglasses like hiding my face will make my tone less embarrassingly jealous.

I feel like sinking into the earth. I ruined my chances with him. I have to let go.

Chapter Forty-Six