Page 6 of The Happy Family

‘You’re the one holding the weapon,’ Sadie points out.

‘I’ll put it down, but only if you agree to be quiet,’ I say, and Sadie thinks about it for a moment before she nods. So I keep my word. I lower the clippers onto the breakfast bar between us, hopefully showing that I don’t want to kill her anymore. But the fact that the kitchen knives are in their stand only an arm’s length away from me on this breakfast bar means I have another option if I get the chance to use them.

Sadie’s eyes are on the clippers and maybe now she assumes she is safe. I hope so and it’s a good sign for me that she isn’t running for that door.

‘I really want to experience motherhood,’ I admit. ‘I really want to have my baby and raise him or her in a safe, loving environment. But that can’t happen if I have to go to prison. So please, I’m begging you, show me some mercy.’

‘Mercy? When did you show me any when you meticulously dismantled everything I ever cared about?’

I realise this is a tough sell, so I switch gears and decide to do something that I don’t do very often. I make myself appear vulnerable.

‘You’re right, I didn’t show you any mercy and I’m sorry about that,’ I say. ‘But it’s only because you were right in what you said about me in the garage.’

I’m hoping that ‘admitting’ all of this will make Sadie see me as some desperate woman suffering with her personality, when in fact, I’m only doing this to try and lull her into a false sense of security. I can still see the knives in my peripheral vision, and I will use them if I get the chance.

‘Then give up. Hand yourself in to the police and face the consequences of your actions,’ Sadie suggests. ‘If you admit to everything, then they will be more lenient and you can still have a life after this. You can still be a mother to your child.’

‘Do you really think so?’ I ask, really playing the sad victim now and not the crazed killer I was appearing to be a few moments ago.

‘Yes, I do,’ Sadie says, as good a lie as I have ever heard and I’ve heard a lot in my time. Most of them have come out of my mouth. That’s when I realise that Sadie is playing a game here like I am. While I am only trying to say what I think she wants to hear, she is simply doing the same to me. But who will win this game?

‘Will you help me?’ I ask her. ‘If I do this. If I give myself up and tell the police everything. Will you help me get a lesser punishment so I can be with my child again one day? Will you say whatever you have to say to make them go easier on me?’

There’s absolutely no way any sane person would agree to that, not after I stole their family and ruined their life. That’s why I know Sadie would never agree to it. But she keeps on playing her game, nonetheless.

‘Yes, I will,’ she replies, lying through her teeth but doing her best not to show it. ‘I’ll help you. This can all be okay. The important thing is that you don’t make it worse for yourself now.’

Worse for myself? Yeah, right. But I just nod my head and look as sad and confused as I can and then I step away from the clippers, proving that I am serious about not using them again. But each step I take brings me closer to the knives and, as Sadie isn’t moving yet, I’m getting closer to her again now too.

‘I’m scared,’ I tell her, putting a hand on my belly for effect. ‘I just want to be a good mother. Like you.’

Sadie is watching me, but that’s okay because if she’s doing that, she’s not watching the knives that are now very near where I stand.

‘I just wanted to be like you,’ I carry on. ‘You had everything and I had nothing and I guess I lost sight of what was right and wrong. But I’m not a bad person. You have to believe me.’

‘I do,’ Sadie says, which would be tragic if it were true. But she doesn’t believe a word I’m saying. She’s just glad I’m not trying to kill her again. Not yet.

I lunge for the knives and grab the biggest one I can by the handle before thrusting it towards Sadie. I’ve aimed for her chest, but I’d be happy if the blade penetrated her anywhere on her body, as long as it immobilised her and left her weak for the kill. But she raises her hands and grabs hold of the same handle I am holding, stopping the knife just inches away from her body.

She’s stronger than I thought. Or more desperate. Or smarter. Maybe she was anticipating all along that I’d go for the knives and she was waiting for me to make my move.

‘Die, bitch,’ I say as I try and force the knife to move the final few inches it needs to in order to plunge into her. But she is pushing back with all her strength and the blade is not moving. We’re deadlocked in a desperate fight to the death, both of us aware that whoever gives in first will be the one who ends up with this knife inside them.

I grit my teeth and press forward but Sadie pushes slightly harder before I hear a loud crack in my wrist. I feel a jolt of pain emanate from the same part of my body and cry out as I realise to my horror that in all the pushing and the pressure we were enforcing on one another’s hands, I have just injured my wrist.

I’m instantly weakened and Sadie has the upper hand, although I drop the knife, meaning she can’t use it against me immediately.

As I grab my injured wrist with my spare, useful hand, Sadie scoops the knife from the kitchen floor and then slashes at me, drawing blood on my arm, and I howl in pain.

I clutch my arm and feel the blood seeping through my nightdress. It’s not a fatal wound, but it’s a deep and painful one and it’s shocked me, just like my injured wrist shocked me when it felt like it snapped. But why would Sadie care about any of that? Instead, she is running for the door again.

‘No!’ I cry, but I won’t be able to catch her this time.

She’s too fast and I’m too injured and too shellshocked at how Sadie used the knife on me, as well as the fact that she still has that knife in her hand and is willing to use it again if tested. That means that all I can do is watch as she reaches the door, flings it open and runs into the hallway. The only thing stopping her reaching Reid and her children now is the staircase. I have no doubt that she will run upstairs, and once she is upstairs, she will be reunited with them and I will be left down here alone, just like I was alone before I found this family.

I can’t believe it. It’s over. I’ve lost.

‘Reid! Wake up!’ Sadie shouts as she reaches out for the handrail on the stairs, moving as fast as her legs will carry her.