Page 45 of Nothing At All

“Like you know anything about this.” Deanne had been into him from the beginning.

Chuck grinned, white teeth flashing against his dark beard. “You’ve met Tick, right?”

“Yeah.” What did his brother have to do with anything?

“He’s a prime example. A little dumb when it comes to women.”

“He’s doing okay.” I’d seen him with his wife when they visited from Texas. She looked at him like he was the best thing since sliced bread. Frowning, I tried to remember how Lila looked at me. The endeavor hurt my face, and my brain refused to conjure any memories, like skimming over murky water.

“Yeah, now. You know that dumbass actually let the sentence ‘I don’t love you yet’ or words to that effect out of his mouth with her.”

“I get how she felt.”

“She didn’t love him then, either.” Chuck waved the sympathy away. “And he was definitely the first to fall. It took her a while. Same with Grandaddy and Grandma. So it’s a thing. Sometimes you’re at different spots emotionally. Doesn’t mean you won’t meet up.”

“I’m supposed to just wait?”

“That’s your pride talking.” Chuck thumped over his heart with an easy finger. “What does this say?”

“That I’d wait for her.” My shoulders slumped again. Hell, my whole body felt heavy. “As long as it takes.”

“Same thing Grandaddy said to Grandma. Then you walk it out.” Chuck chomped off a bite of cookie. “She gets to the I love you place with you or–”

“She doesn’t.” Nausea rose in my throat and not from my concussion.

“Or she doesn’t.” Chuck propped his hips against the island and took another bite of cookie. He saluted me with his uneaten half. “But you know you gave it every possible chance. You can’t control her feelings, buddy. Just your own.”

The idea of her never loving me pressed in. Sure, people loved more than once – Chuck’s mama had a longterm boyfriend she adored – but then there were people like Vic who lost and afterward settled for hookups like Santillan.

I breathed through the panic gripping my lungs. I couldn’t make her feel anything, anymore than I could make my father do right.

Chuck was right. All I could control was my actions, reactions and choices.

I could choose the risk, like I did every day putting on my uniform and badge. Walking away from her simply guaranteed the loss.

“You’re thinking hard there.”

“Making my brain hurt.”

“You don’t have to have all the answers today.” Chuck tossed the last bite of cookie in his mouth and brushed crumbs from his beard. “It’s a marathon, not a sprint.”

“You’re a walking cliche.” I glared at the crumbs on my floor.

“Cliche because it’s true.” He ambled to the pantry for the whisk broom and dustpan. He bent down to sweep. “Get some sleep. Let your head heal. She didn’t ditch you last night, so she’ll probably wait around a couple of days.”

“Thanks, man.” I shoved his shoulder as he walked to the trashcan. “Real encouraging.”

His chuckle rumbled between us, low and affectionate.

Minutes later, I walked down with him, my body protesting each stair step. Mackey had not been kidding about being sore.

A familiar SUV sat in Nicole’s drive, and Allison hurried down the side steps when she spotted me. Her blonde ponytail bounced against her black sweater. “Dan, I’m glad I caught you.”

With a slight frown, I waited. Next to me, Chuck tensed. She ignored him, like didn’t even look at him, which I guess made sense seeing as she’d dated his dumb-with-women older brother back in high school. They’d ended badly.

Like she’d slept with Tick and Chuck’s cousin and Tick caught them badly.

“I was checking on Nicole, bringing her some lunch. She’s on bedrest.” Concern pulled at her mouth, corners turning down before she smiled at me, eyes blank. “You have no idea how much I appreciate you taking care of her lately.”