Page 38 of Easy On Me

“I’m serious.” I jostled her a little. “I’ll leave it up to you, and right now, we can build a relationship with or without the rings.”

My nape heated, and my belly flip-flopped again, the way it reacted whenever I faced down something that really mattered. Something I wanted and was afraid I’d fuck up.

She didn’t say anything.

I swallowed. “Being married makes all the baby stuff easier, though. You know, names and birth certificates and the legal stuff.”

For a long moment, she held my gaze. An emotion flickered in hers, almost like hurt, before her face smoothed over and she pushed back from my chest. “I’ll think about it, but no promises. This is a lot all by itself tonight, Jase.”

“I know.” I didn’t drag her close, even though my palms itched to. “I’d be a good husband.”

Once more, she went still, that hint of pain whispering through her hazel gaze. “I know you would.”

Silence stretched between us, a quiet that ached with a tense loss I didn’t understand. Finally, she eased off my lap and rubbed her palms down her thighs. “You’re feeding me tonight, right?”

I scrambled up, feeling like I’d broken an opportunity without realizing I held it in my hands and without knowing how I’d fractured it. “Yeah. Flank steak and roasted vegetables. Should be about ready.”

“Good.” Her smile was too bright, not nearly real enough. “I’m hungry.”

“Yeah.” I scrubbed a hand through my hair. “Tyler? We’re okay, right?”

“Sure.” Her lips stretched, and this smile wasn’t any better. “Peachy.”

I wasn’t stupid, but I also knew better than to push. She’d probably shut down on me, and I’d have to start all over again. Besides, everything had changed tonight. Now I was afraid I’d lose her.

And it scared me how I’d do almost anything to keep that from happening.

Chapter Ten

Tyler

Winter sunlight poured through the tall windows overlooking the manicured knot garden hidden behind the house. The wood floors gleamed with both the sunlight and the glow of the fireplace. I loved this room, ever since the first time I’d set foot inside it, the day the social worker brought me to meet Mama Nancy.

Cradling a warm mug of Mama Nancy’s spiced tea, I snuggled into the plush floral sofa and sighed. “I need to talk with you about something with me and Jase.”

Brows arched, Mama Nancy settled into her chair, the leather worn and comfortable. She had on her Saturday lounge suit, the pink one because the gray one was for Sunday afternoons. “Am I listening, giving advice or taking action?”

That taking action sounded like a threat of bodily harm.

“I don’t know yet.” She had me, would always have me in a way that warmed me throughout. I could rest in knowing I could trust her to always be with me. Jase made me feel like that, too. “I’m pregnant.”

Her eyes lit up. I could already see her fantasies of being Grandma Nancy rolling through her imagination before her gaze took on an incisive gleam. “Do you want to have it?”

“Yes.” Throat tight, I sipped my tea, peppermint tickling my nose, the china warm against my hands. Fighting down the panic ballooning in my chest, I focused on the sensations instead of the overwhelming fear. I was having a baby, but it terrified me. “But I’m scared. What if I’m not good at it?”

“What if you stop talking absolute nonsense? I know you better.”

“I don’t know anything about babies–”

“I didn’t know anything about teenagers, but I let people help me and I learned. If this is what you want, I’ll be with you every step of the way.”

Silence lingered while she watched me take that in, her certainty settling me like always. Then she pursed her lips. “You said something with you and Jase. Did he act sideways about this?”

Oh, that was definitely a bodily harm threat.

“No.” I tapped the side of my mug, eyeing the gleam of Topless & Barefoot on my nails, the restless rhythm grounding me. “He wants us to get married.”

Her brows rose again, but otherwise, her expression gave nothing away. “What do you want?”