Page 50 of Secrets on Ice

“No.” She sniffles. “This is me working my shit out.” She sits on the floor with her back against the bed.

I sit beside her.

“He wrote that I was the love of his life.”

I look down at the card. “I’m sure he believed it when he wrote it.”

“He was probably sleeping with Kevin then.”

“You will drive yourself crazy thinking about that. After the first betrayal, the number doesn’t matter.”

She wipes her face.

“I keep trying to make it make sense.”

“You might never.”

“How do you marry someone while being in love with somebody else?”

I shrug. “I don’t know.” It was more how could you watch the woman you loved at the time marry someone else, that I do know a bit about.

“How do you sleep beside someone every night and lie to them?”

“I really don’t know, Cass.”

She lets out a sigh. “How did I miss it? How could I have been so blind?”

“You trusted him. And honestly, I never saw the signs. I’ve been going over everything, trying to see if there was anything off, and there wasn’t.”

“I feel stupid.”

“But you’re not, no one suspected this. They were good liars.”

“But a wife should have known.”

“No, Cass. He should have told you years ago, but he is a selfish fucking asshole instead.”

She looks down at the cards again. “I hate him.”

“You’re allowed to.”

“And I miss him.”

“You’re allowed that too,” I reassure her.

She leans her head against my shoulder. “When did you become sensible?”

“I’ve always been sensible.”

She snorts. “You once dyed your hair blond because a woman said she liked blonds.”

“And it worked.”

She shakes her head and holds the cards out to me. “Burn box.”

I still. “Are you sure?”

“No.”