Page 114 of Hades

Something in her voice made me look up.

There was understanding there. Not the polite kind people offered when they wanted to be comforting. Real understanding. Personal understanding.

I wondered again what that mother of hers had done to her.

I wondered how much of Lettie’s sweetness had been grown out of love and how much had been forced to survive neglect.

“I’ve been thinking about what you said before,” I said, keeping my voice even.

Lettie’s brows drew together slightly, but there was no confusion in her eyes. Only recognition. “About helping you?”

I nodded once. “About being prepared.”

She didn’t ask anything else right away. She didn’t need to. Whatever she’d offered me before, she’d known I wasn’t ready then.

“I still have it,” she said quietly after a moment. “It won’t hurt him. It’ll just make it impossible for him to keep up.”

I let out a slow breath. “That might be enough.”

She studied me for a moment longer, something like approval settling into her expression. Then she gave a small, resolute nod. “Okay. I’ll get it for you.”

But I saw the sadness move through her as she nodded.

“I’m not running,” I told her.

“I didn’t think you were.”

“I need to say it anyway.” I lifted my chin. More for myself than for her. “I’m not running from the club. I’m not abandoning my children. I’m not leaving because Lucas broke me.”

Her eyes softened.

“I’m leaving because I need to remember who I was before him. Or maybe figure out who I would have been without him.”

Lettie’s lips parted, but she didn’t speak right away. When she did, her voice was quiet. “I think that’s brave.”

Something cracked in my chest.

Brave.

I’d been called many things in my life. Strong. Loyal. Stubborn. Difficult. Queen. Mother. Old lady. A bitch.

Not brave.

Never brave.

I looked away before she could see too much.

“I don’t feel brave.”

“Maybe brave doesn’t feel brave while you’re doing it.”

I smiled despite myself. “You sound like someone much older than twenty-five.”

She gave me a small shrug. “I’ve always been older than I should be.”

The words slipped out too easily.

Too honestly.