Page 111 of His Reckless Freshman

I’m not ready to talk to her about any of this.

Not until I’ve set things right with Ben.

“Just do it, Jolie. Get your butt over there and tell him how you feel. If there’s even a chance it’s mutual, it’ll be worth it. He needs to know that you’re not like those other girls.” I nod, a spark of determination firing through me as I try to lean into my hypothesis about why he’s pushing me away.

If I’m right and he’s trying to guard himself against heartbreak, then I can put his mind at ease.

It has to happen tonight, no matter how nervous I am.

If I don’t get to Ben’s house and do this, I’ll just obsess over it and elongate this whole thing. So I’m going.

Decision made, I push open my door and actually feel the best I have all day. Sometimes all you need is some decisive action, right?

A plan of attack. A way to move forward.

Nylah’s on her bed and looks over when I walk in.

“Hey.” I force some extra brightness into my tone and hope she isn’t one of those people with a sixth sense that can tell my insides are in chaos. Dropping my phone on my bed, I unbutton my jacket and wonder what she’s thinking.

“How are ya?”

“Good.” I bob my head and start kicking off my boots and letting the jacket slip from my shoulders. I need to figure out what to wear.

What kind of message am I trying to send?

The “I’m falling in love with you” kind.

Yeah, but what does that look like clothing-wise?

Opening my closet, I pull out my best dress. The one I wear if I’m going out for dinner someplace nice.

Holding it by the hanger, I look it up and down.

“You going out?” Nylah asks.

“Yep.” I nod, flashing her a smile as giddy bubbles burst in my chest. Oh man, I must be blushing. My whole body is getting all warm because I just had the thought that if this goes well tonight… then I might be lying naked in Ben’s bed soon.

Or even not naked.

Just holding him.

Kissing him.

In his arms!

I’ll take any level of connection, just as long as he knows that I’m totally into him.

Please let him be into me too! Please let this work!

“On a date?” Nylah grins at me.

I hitch my shoulder. It’s not exactly a date. More like a desperate declaration that will hopefully pay off.

“You’re totally going on a date.” Nylah’s smile only gets bigger.

I still, biting my lip and staring at the dress. Maybe I shouldn’t be going fancy. Maybe if I show up looking like I want to go on a date, he’ll freak out and not hear what I’m trying to say, you know?

Glancing at Nylah, I wrinkle my nose, then shove the dress back into my closet, reaching for a pair of yoga pants instead.