Page 208 of Ashborne: Defiance

It wasn’t often I was glad for the walk to the solitude. But today, with my mind closed, and my heart thumping, moving was needed. If only my fucking blood would stop boiling in my veins, perhaps my skin would cease its smarting, and I might be able to rest.

But halfway into this walk, something had happened. My tension grew, rather than eased.

Normally, I would have reached for Kham, but he’d been so frustrated with me earlier, I couldn’t stomach another lecture.

Minutes later, drawing close to the solitude, I caught myself panting, and grew alarmed. I was beginning to sweat. I wiped my brow with my sleeve and scanned the forest around me. The air was cool. The sky was mostly gray, but with the high, light clouds that wouldn’t turn to rain.

My stomach churned, nerves bubbling into my chest until it felt like I walked the halls of my childhood home, waiting the fall of the proverbial guillotine.

What the hell was wrong with me?

I loosened the cravat at my throat and opened the top buttons of my formal shirt, brimming with agitated energy, my body twisted with torment, blood simmering. I hadn’t felt this way since Koa’s heat.

Shit. Shit, no.

Panicking, I started to run, praying I’d burn off the energy, but already my mind turned back to Grace. Back at the castle with all the men, resplendent in that gown, her hair tickling her neck.

The way their eyes followed her. The way she smiled and welcomed them.

The way she smiled at me.

And then Kham’s words, each falling with the thud of a drum.

A mate is a gift. A divine blessing. Only a fool would resist her.

My breath broke in my throat with the same tormented groan I’d suffered during Koa’s heat. I broke through the trees and into that clearing, so close to the treehouse. My solitude. My sanctuary.

My… my… mate.

Mine.

No.

I yanked at the cravat as I strode across the clearing, but I only succeeded in tightening the knot. I cursed and brought both hands up to fiddle with it.

If I could get it off, I’d wash in the creek. Its chill would soothe the burn in my skin and douse the fire.

Tend the flame.

Shit.

I picked up my pace and started praying as my body pressed. Drove me forward. Demanded her.

“Please,” I prayed.

I couldn’t do this. Not now. Not when she was so vulnerable. Not when I was so shaky.

My heart has taken a body and now walks on its own, outside of my chest…

She is beauty, fierce joy, bolstering strength.

She is my delight.

Nausea surged in my stomach, and I truly thought I might lose my sanity. Tossing my pride aside as surely as I would a dirty shit, I opened my mind and reached for Kham.

‘Kham? Kham, what’s—’

I grunted, and flinched, my chest slammed like it had been punched. My heart flipping and pounding, threatening to tear itself from my chest.