Page 53 of Shadowborne: Reckoning

Kgosi blew a heavy breath in a snort that made Benji jump. Then he shook his head as if trying to release himself from tension. ‘If another Primarch were to step into my herd, to insert himself in their minds without their permission… Donavyn, it is a violation no different than occurred to Bren.’

I went still with shock ‘Just to speak to them? You’re raping them?’

‘No, no. I… I don’t know how to explain it in your terms. But… I have seen it happen among the young—not in our herd, but a few have come to me from the wild… When a strong dragon takes control in that way… They were stripped of their free will. And it can destroy them.’

I felt the wave of rage rise in him and took a deep breath. Kgosi rarely felt truly angry. More stern. But this… this was a fire in him.

‘What happened to them?’

‘They mostly do not wish to speak of it, and I respect their wishes. But this is how I am certain of what your mate needs, Donavyn. Because it is what other dragons have needed from me: It is a place, a leader to follow, who gives them what they have always needed but never received—a way of conducting ourselves that proves the other way wrong. No more. No less. Pressing them into the places that are healthy for them, and away from the places that aren’t. Stand alongside them in it. Applaud the victories, and encourage through failure. These are things you know.’

I nodded. ‘Things we know, but cannot logically discuss,’ I said.

‘Words in isolation do not heal because they can be false. Only love and honor in action—the experience of real truth, can truly mend a wound.’

‘So… if you were to force yourself on these dragons… they would see it as another example of the ways they’ve been violated?’

‘Perhaps. Individually, if I intervene to aid and they need it, they will heal through it. But I cannot know until the action is taken—and that decision shouldn’t be made lightly. Moreover, even if I’m able to help some, it’s an offence to the Primarcy, and to the herd link—I will learn things of others that were not entrusted to me… Take access in their minds without permission, when that should only happen in the most dire of circumstances. The autonomy of a dragon’s mind is a precious gift that we choose to share. It’s why we don’t breach what our humans hide from us. To do so would be the human equivalent of… well, of stripping you naked before another against your will.’

Dear Lord… I blew out a breath and raked a hand through my hair. I’d known the dragons held links in high regard, and were wary of pushing into each other’s minds. But I’d thought that was manners—similar in our culture of not interrupting a conversation or intruding on someone’s privacy. An act of respect. I never imagined…

‘I understand, Keg. I won’t ask you to do that unless the need becomes dire, then.’

‘Thank you, Donavyn. If I perceived abuse or some threat to these dragons, I would be more willing. But they seem healthy and provided for. Only… restricted, which I do not understand. But if they are choosing that for themselves, it is not an offense to me.’

‘My fear is that somehow they’re being pressured, or coerced.’

‘And I do not have assurance it is not that, which is why I’ll seek the Creator’s guidance on it. I cannot measure the threat without knowing their minds.’

‘Thank you, Kgosi.’

‘Thank you, Donavyn. You honor me with your respect.’

I slapped his leg again, then sighed and turned to Benji, who’d stood a little way off, staring back in the direction of the wild herds.

“Are you ready to fly, Benji? I need to return to the castle.”

The boy took one more moment, then nodded and jogged back to Kgosi’s side.

As I helped him grasp the mounting strap and haul himself up—he was surprisingly spry—I was once again struck with the rapid growth the boy was experiencing.

‘Give a boy a man’s job, he will quickly become a man,’ Kgosi said solemnly. I was about to answer with equal seriousness, until my dragon added, ‘I learned this from experience.’

As I pulled myself up behind Benji and got settled in my seat, I shook my head at my dragon’s levity. But I couldn’t find it in myself.

‘Am I asking too much of him? I still haven’t broached my idea, which would require even more of him.’

‘No. All of this is his purpose. But as you know, our purposes are rarely easy.’

‘God, isn’t that the truth.’

Kgosi didn’t need to respond as Benji and I both took hold of the straps, and he lurched forward to gallop into flight.

Truth had a habit of needing no further explanation.

18. Not a Boy. Not Yet a Man

~ DONAVYN ~