Page 121 of Lethal Weakness

“I wasn’t stalking you. I just couldn’t stop trying to see glimpses of your stupidly handsome face.” Her fingers pinch my chin. “Which is how it made it so easy to suspect you behind the mask.”

“Did I scare you?”

“The unknown scared me, but you never did.”

I can’t contain the exhale of relief. “I never want you to be afraid of anything ever again.”

“I’ll be afraid every time you walk out the door.”

“They’ve got a location on Edmund and Merrill. I have to go.”

Her face falls just at the mention of their names.

“All those people they took… Dead,” she chokes out. “I’m sitting here alive, and in love, and happy… And they’re all dead. It’s not fair. They deserved to live,” she cries.

I tuck her into my chest and let her feel all of it. If I had even an ounce of the heart that she did, then I never would have survived the horrors I’ve seen. Now I only wish I knew how to navigate emotions so I could help ease hers.

If I wasn’t so stunted, I could do more than hold her. But if this is all I have, then I’ll do it well.

My fingers stroke her back, in the way my mother used to do to me. It’s moments like this when I can’t help but remember my parents, and I almost let the grief creep back in.

Shove it down. Shove it away.

“Jack?”

The drumming of my heart nearly drowns out her voice. Shove it down. “Yeah, baby.”

“I’m sorry.”

“For what?”

“I’m not strong like you. I can’t handle this.”

I cradle her cheek in my hand. “Don’t say that. You’re stronger than I’ve ever been. Don’t ever apologize.”

“But–”

“You’re better than me, Linden. Don’t you see that? I don’t want you to be anything like me. I–” Shove it down. Shove it away.

“You what?”

“I want to be like you.”

“You want to cry all the time?”

“I don’t want to be afraid to feel.”

“You can, you know? With me.” She wipes her eyes. “I can handle whatever you’ve got.”

Looking at her tear-stained cheeks is nothing compared to the brightness in her eyes. The spirit of hers that never dulls. No matter what life throws at her. She doesn’t lock it away.

She feels all of it, and deals with it.

It used to be easier to shove the pain away, but I can’t anymore.

“I failed them, Linden. I was in that house night after night and had no idea those poor souls were down there. We always suspected another location, but we were wrong. I should have found them. I could have saved them.”

“No, I saw how well they were hidden. They made sure no one would suspect what they were doing. They had full-blown parties right on top of their sick medical room. If I can’t blame myself, then you can’t blame yourself either.” Her tone is stern with authority, and it makes me smile. She’s a force to be reckoned with.